


I'll Tell You All About It When I See You Again

by taylorswift81



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Military AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-27
Updated: 2015-11-17
Packaged: 2018-03-26 01:06:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 25,858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3831487
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/taylorswift81/pseuds/taylorswift81
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tommy and Felicity Merlyn have been inseparable since birth. Then they meet Oliver Queen, and everything changes as they become an unstoppable trio; the best of friends. When Tommy and Oliver enlist in the military, and when Felicity leaves for a new life at MIT, the group is separated for the first time. Will they be able to find their way back to each other?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. When Our World Was One Block Wide

“Tommy Merlyn! Stop pulling your sister’s hair, immediately!” Tommy stepped back from Felicity, casting a mischievous grin in her direction before darting out of her reach,  running up the stairs with a cackle. Felicity huffed and sniffled as she came to stand by her mother, leaning against her side as her mother gently brushed a hand over her hair. “He’ll grow up eventually, Lyss. He loves you, he’s just hell-bent on being a terror.” Felicity smiled, hugging her mother’s legs.

“Hell’s a bad word, mommy.” Her mother couldn’t help but to smile as well, unable to keep in a small laugh at her youngest child, no matter the fact that there was only a five minute gap between the two of them. Felicity, at only 6, was already a girl very happy with her rules and routine.

“I’m sorry, princess. Why don’t you go put your shoes on? It’s almost time for school.” Felicity nodded, hair flying as she spun to gather her things. Rebecca shook her head, listening to all of the sounds in her house. She could hear Malcolm walking around upstairs, getting ready for another day at the office. Tommy was sprinting down the stairs, calling out to his sister, giggling when he pulled her hair as he passed. Felicity pouted and shook her head, tying up her shoelaces before tearing after her brother, both children throwing themselves into the car, bothering the family driver.

Rebecca kissed her husband goodbye, before following her children out to the car and listening to the stories they had to tell her. Even at their age, Tommy and Felicity were cemented into their personalities. Felicity was curious and brilliant, preferring to take things apart to find out how they worked over simply playing with them. Tommy was a free-spirit, a harmless prankster and troublemaker who lived to drive his sister crazy. More than that, he worshipped Felicity, and had looked after her since the day they were both born. Felicity, similiarly, doted on Tommy, even when he drove her to the edge. It comforted Rebecca to know that whatever happened, Tommy and Felicity would always have each other.

“Bye mommy!” Felicity mumbled, pressing a wet kiss against her cheek as Tommy did the same on her other side. Rebecca smiled, hugging her kids to her before they took off, anxious to get to class.

 

* * *

 

 

 

“Class, we have a new student. His name is Oliver Queen and I would like you all to make sure he feels welcome.” Felicity craned her neck to get a good view of the boy in the front of the classroom. He had bright blue eyes, like her and Tommy, and bright blonde hair on his head, sticking up all over the place. The teacher sat him next to Tommy, who immediately started talking to Oliver, only stopping when the teacher cleared her throat.

By the time that recess arrived, Tommy was anxiously bouncing in his chair. He immediately grabbed Oliver, pulling him over to Felicity, who eyed him warily. Felicity had never had to share her brother before, and she didn’t want to be left out. Oliver turned to Felicity and complimented her watch, letting Felicity explain that she had made it from pieces of multiple watches, before telling her that her hair reminded him of a halo. She giggled, thinking that maybe Oliver Queen wasn’t such a bad addition to their group.

So began the making of the quirkiest, most dysfunctional, but somehow still the closest group that Starling City had ever seen. Never was one seen without the others, and never would anyone dare to come between the Meryln’s and Oliver. Their parents quickly became friends, looking on with fondess in their eyes as their kids grew remarkably in just their first year of schooling. Tommy brought out the rebel in Oliver, and it was rare for both of them to not be receiving lectures from teachers. Felicity always stubbornly defending their honor, diligently making sure that she was involved in their shenanigans. Felicity brought out the sympathy and pure, good humanity in the two boys, without trying. They always listened to what she had to say, even if they didn’t heed it very well, and in just a few months, the three of them built a relationship amongst themselves that would last forever.

 

* * *

 

“Why do I always have to be the sidekick?” Tommy whined, looking down at his Robin mask with disgust. Oliver heaved a put upon sigh, glancing at Felicity with a look of pure frustration.

“Becauseeeee, Felicity is the only girl, and so she gets to be the hero’s trust girl who always helps him because she wants to be. She can’t be your tusty girl because she’s your sister.” Felicity couldn’t help but shake her head as she fiddled with a lose wire in her supercomputer. The first time she had said that she wanted to help the superheroes, Oliver had latched onto it to guarantee he would always get to play Batman, and the Green Arrow. Tommy moaned and groaned every time, but still always suggested that superheroes be the game for them to play. She had found that they enjoyed being the ones to save Felicity, in varying and always detailed ways. She came to the realization that Oliver and Tommy had absorbed the idea that, though everything, they needed to protect Felicity. She knew it came from their parents, and the relationships in movies and shows  they’d seen where, no matter what, the girl needed to be protected. It had been that way their entire friendship/siblingship, and Felicity wouldn’t have it any other way. She made sure that they knew that she could take care of herself, like Black Widow, but anytime, anywhere, she knew that Tommy and Oliver would always have her back.

“Tommy! Felicity! It’s time to go, okay? You can come back and play tomorrow.” They all sighed, Felicity packing up her electronics into her backpack with a mournful, somber expression. They gathered by their parents, exchanging hugs and goodbyes with the air of being at a funeral. Their parents exchanged amused glances, Rebecca and Malcolm packing their children into their car, laughing quietly to themselves about the unstoppable trio, the best of friends.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. So. This was a basic set up chapter, to get the ball rolling on this story, the other chapters I've outlined/written are much longer. That being said, this is my first multi-chapter fic, so I ask you all to bear with me as I figure out how to do this! What started as a simple military!AU has quickly spiraled into a giant fic that I am looking forward to delving into, if you guys will be willing to put up with my crazy and follow this. Updates SHOULD be weekly, at the most, but I will do my best to update as soon and often as possible! Let me know what you thought of the first chapter (:
> 
> As will be said every chapter, thank you to my wonderful, wonderful beta over on tumblr, arrows-and-tech  
> You can also find me on tumblr, at ollie-and-licity


	2. Always Be Together

The first day of middle school, Felicity realized with abject horror that she no longer had every class with Tommy and Oliver. She stood frozen in the doorway, scanning the room again, even though she knew that if they were there, she would have noticed them trying to wet willie each other, or even unsuspecting students. A frown on her features, she found a seat and dumped herself into it, throwing her binder on her desk and dropping her head onto her crossed arms, huffing a sigh of frustration.

“Rough first day?” Felicity sat up, brushing hair out of her face as she looked up at the girl who had spoken. She recognized that it was Laurel Lance, daughter of the best police detective in Starling. Felicity had seen Laurel around in previous years, but had never made a connection with her, as she usually kept to herself and her friend group. That, and the fact that Felicity was usually busy running after Tommy and Oliver in a misguided attempt to keep them from blowing anything up.

“I don’t have any classes with my brother or best friend, and we’ve always been in the same classes so it’s pretty disappointing. I’m Felicity, by the way. Just in case you didn’t know, but I’m not saying that you had to know, I just don’t want an awkward situation where you like think my name is Jessica and then there’s that awkward moment later where I have to tell you I’m actually Felicity and it would be a big mess and you know what I’m going to stop talking now.” Laurel let out a small laugh, dropping into the seat next to Felicity, placing her things on her desk before turning back to Felicity.

“I’m Laurel.” Felicity smiled, happy that the girl hadn’t been concerned by her babbling. She was always told that she thought too fast for her mouth to catch up, and that’s why she ended up talking peoples’ ears off if they didn’t know how to stop her. They chatted aimlessly whenever they could during class, establishing a base idea of who they thought the other person was. Felicity found that Laurel was smart, and already knew that she wanted to be a lawyer, the same way that Felicity knew it was her destiny to go on and become a renowned IT specialist. They had all of their classes leading up to lunch together, so they stuck near each other until Felicity spotted Tommy and Oliver at their usual lunch table.

“You guys!” She yelled, smothering them into a hug, gently knocking their heads together. “I can’t believe that they separated us! I haven’t seen a single person get wet willied or pranked in any sort of form. I miss it.” They hugged Felicity back, whining when she wouldn’t let them go.

“Felicity, you’re going to rip my head off if you don’t let go, and then who’s going to be the Batman to your IT specialist?” Oliver asked. She rolled her eyes, letting them go before sitting across the table from them, pulling Laurel with her.

“Noobs, this is Laurel. She’s my new favorite.” Tommy’s mouth dropped open as he gaped at Felicity, fighting to keep the expression on his face when Oliver mimicked him. She rolled her eyes again, setting her backpack on the floor before turning to Tommy. “You better close your mouth big brother, before something flies into it.” Felicity scolded him, sounding so much like their mother that he complied out of habit.

“I thought I was your favorite!” Oliver whined, dramatically reaching across the table for Felicity’s hand. She shot a glance at Laurel, but couldn’t help the smile that took over her features. She had missed Oliver and Tommy, as stupid as they sometimes acted. It would take a while to get used to being separated, but she knew they could all make it through, just as close as ever.

Lunch passed quickly, quicker than she would have wanted, but she was glad to see that Oliver and Tommy quickly warmed up to Laurel. Felicity had been the only girl her whole life, and she didn’t realize how much she enjoyed having a female presence in her life. At the end of the day, however, they were still her boys.

Felicity and Laurel found that their only class together with the boys was at the end of the day, and it was everyone’s least favorite subject: history. Tommy and Oliver struggled to pay attention from the beginning; a combination of too much energy and the knowledge that they would be free afterwards. They pestered Laurel with questions to get to know her, talking over each other to finish each other’s sentences. Felicity tried, and failed, to pay attention and eventually gave up in favor of outlining a new program in her notebook.

 

* * *

 

 

The next few months passed in a blur of classes and getting Tommy and Oliver out of trouble. Laurel helped, sometimes, but she usually stuck to pleading the fifth before sprinting out of sight, leaving Felicity to roll her eyes and sweet talk the teacher.

That day, Laurel was coming to the Merlyn mansion and bringing her younger sister, Sara, so that Oliver’s younger sister, Thea, would have someone to play with. Felicity hadn’t seen Thea much in the years she had been friends with Oliver, but the older she got, the more they saw her. She was an unending ball of energy, curls flying as she dotingly chased after her older brother. Oliver pretended to hate it in front of Tommy, but Felicity could see that he really cared for her.

“Licity! Laurel’s here.” Felicity carefully untangled herself from the maze of wires she was elbow deep in, before running to greet Laurel. Her sister stood at her side, hand fisted in Laurel’s jacket as she curiously looked around.

“Liss, this is Sara.” Felicity smiled gently at Sara, and watched as she slowly crept out from her sister’s shadow.

“Hey Sara, I’m Felicity, but you can call me whatever you want, since apparently everyone has a different name for me anyway. But, you can also just call me Felicity if you want, I don’t mind and-“ Oliver clapped a hand over her mouth, having come up behind her, while he smiled at Sara.

“Sorry, we’re still training her. This is Thea, my little sister.” He said, pulling Thea from behind his back with the hand that wasn’t on Felicity’s mouth. Thea grinned at Sara, who immediately responded with her own grin, and Felicity knew that they were in trouble. They took off upstairs, giggling and shrieking, and everyone gathered in the foyer couldn’t help but laugh.

Felicity glanced up at Oliver, catching his loving smile for his sister when he thought no one was watching, before watching it change into a grimace when Felicity licked his hand. He took his hand off her mouth, wiping it on her shirt. “Come on, Angel. That’s just mean.” Felicity grinned wickedly, countering her nickname perfectly. Oliver had been calling her that since they’d become friends, because of the way her curls stood out from her head like a curly blonde halo.

“That’s what happens when you try to train me, you big goon.” She mumbled, pushing against his shoulder as she walked past him. Laurel followed her, and after exchanging glances, Oliver and Tommy did too. “Are we watching a movie today?” Felicity asked, throwing herself onto the sofa, spread eagle, with a sigh of relaxation. Laurel sat beside her, more reserved and put together than Felicity’s current sprawl, and she couldn’t help but smile. Laurel had always been prim and neat, but she fell victim to Felicity’s mischievous grin and convincing words, so much like her brothers.

“Budge up, Licity, you’re taking up all the room.” Felicity heaved a put upon sigh, moving her legs so Oliver could sit, before dropping her feet into his lap. He rolled his eyes but didn’t move her, and she smiled smugly to herself. Tommy and Felicity were affectionate with each other, and they rarely fought, but Oliver let her get away with more. He’d been wrapped around her finger from the beginning, and the same went for her. They were best friends, comrades, and nothing could change that. Tommy set up the movie, after they all agreed to watch a horror film, before he sat himself next to Laurel. In the same way that Felicity had blatantly attached herself to Oliver, Tommy and Laurel had, surprisingly, become just as close. Laurel tamed Tommy’s crazy ideas, and Tommy got Laurel to go along with Felicity’s crazy plans, and, together, they were a flawless team; a group that had found that they were better together than they ever were apart.

The afternoon was spent watching movies and snacking lazily, enjoying their weekend together the same way they always had. “Well, I should check on Speedy and make sure she hasn’t destroyed the entire house. Be right back.” Oliver said, patting Felicity’s feet to get her to move them off of his lap. Laurel followed him, wanting to reign in her sister as well, which left Felicity and Tommy to start a competition to see who could catch the most gummy bears in their mouths at once.

“You liar, I totally caught that one!” Felicity yelled, dumping the bag on Tommy’s head as he laughed, poking Felicity in her side, which caused her to dissolve into a fit of giggles onto the floor.

“Felicity…Tommy…” They sat up, Felicity’s hair coming out of its pony tail, Tommy’s with spare gummy bears stuck to it, to see Moira in the door of the living room.

“Hey, Mrs. Q. What’s going on?” Tommy asked, attempting to remove the gummy bears with a grimace, glaring at Felicity when she started to giggle again.

“Your parents…they. They got into an accident, I’m so sorry.” Felicity felt the smile freeze on her face before disappearing, as she took in Moira’s tear stained face. Felicity knew it wasn’t a joke, that she would never hurt her and Tommy that way, which meant that it was true. It meant that Felicity and Tommy  had lost their parents. Tommy reached for Felicity’s hand, fingers intertwining with hers as the tears flooded down Felicity’s face without her feeling it. She felt numb; disconnected, and she knew that it hadn’t sunk in for Tommy either. _How was it supposed to_? She wondered to herself, her parents were both on metal slabs in a hospital somewhere.  Tommy pulled Felicity to his side, cradling her in his arms as he whispered to her, making a promise he knew that he would always keep. “I’ll take care of you, Lyss. We’ll get through this together, like we always do.” And he hoped to God that he was right.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! So, the chapters are slowly getting longer. I know it ends on a sort of cliff hanger (and it's still pretty short) and I've already been called a bully for it so feel free to lay it on me guys, I thrive on it. (; I know it doesn't seem like a lot, and I give many props to people who can write massively long chapters without even trying but the older they get the more I have to work with, and trust me, there's a lot to work with coming up so just bear with me through the first few chapters! As always, many thanks to my beta, arrows-and-tech, for being the most amazing beta and name caller to ever live. And, if you feel so inclined to yell at me over on tumblr, you can find me at ollie-and-licity.


	3. We Change, We Wait

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys! So, due to scheduling issues I didn't have this one beta'd in favor of getting this to you guys (mostly) on time, so forgive any errors there might be, because I'm sure they're there. We're pretty much through most of the set up, just one or two more chapters until things start to really go, so I hope you guys are ready!

“Hey, mom, dad. I guess here goes nothing, right? First day of high school…it seems crazy. Time really does fly. I’m sure Tommy will be over sometime later, probably with Laurel. They’re practically inseparable, now. I mean, they still won’t admit they’re dating for who knows what reason but you know what Tommy’s like. He’s really doing okay. I am too, I mean, I miss you guys more than anything, every day, but Moira’s been really good to all of us, taking us in to make sure that we don’t have to leave Starling. She’s been amazing.” Felicity sighed, a small, sad smile on her face. “I should probably get going. I’ll be back soon.” She leaned forward, pressing her fingers against the cold marble, wiping at the few straggling tears that came through. She had built a routine where she came out once every two weeks to talk to her parents and keep them updated on her life. Oliver always came with, but sometimes he let her go to the gravesite alone, waiting for her back in the car. It had taken her months to get over the accident, to piece herself back together. Tommy was her rock, the one person who understood her pain, but eventually Tommy’s stage of grief completely differed from Felicity’s. He lost himself in Laurel’s continued contact, and Felicity threw herself into her work, with a renewed passion for computers. With help from Moira, Felicity had chosen to dedicate her high school years towards getting into MIT.

She’d also found herself growing closer to Thea and Sara, who were both young enough to make Felicity feel like she was the older sister she’d always wanted to be, but old enough to understand her thoughts and feelings. Everyone had been forced to grow up quicker than they realized after the accident, and even Thea and Sara were barely kids anymore. Sara and Thea were never far from the other, and they had taken it upon themselves to take care of Felicity. When she got too lost in her work, they made sure she was eating as much as she needed, they often conned her into various outdoor activities to guarantee breaks, and when she fell asleep at her desk, they went to find Oliver who carried Felicity to her bed after a disastrous attempt by Thea and Sara to carry Felicity themselves, that had ended in Felicity needed new glasses.

“How’d it go, Licity?” Oliver asked her as she climbed into the car. Sara and Thea were chatting amongst themselves in seats to Oliver’s left, and Laurel and Tommy had been driven straight to school by Captain Lance.

“Same as usual.” She told him with a small smile, feeling the ache for her missing parents more than usual, as she always did after seeing them. Oliver reciprocated her smile, grabbing her hand and giving it a gentle squeeze before the driver started the car, and drove them to school, Felicity lost in thoughts and memories.

 

* * *

 

 

Felicity heard a gentle knock on her door, and without glancing around she pushed her glasses up her nose and sighed. “Oliver, it is the third week back to school, I am _so_ not doing your homework.”

“Good thing I’m not Ollie, then.” Tommy said with a laugh as Felicity turned to face him with a smile, shutting her computer down and turning to face him, pulling her knee up to rest her chin on.

“What’s up, big brother?” She asked him, surprised when he dropped onto her bed. She pushed herself off of her chair, bouncing onto the bed beside Tommy, her hands resting on her stomach as she stared at the ceiling.

“I just wanted to talk, I guess. I know I’ve been with Laurel a lot, lately, maybe too much, so I haven’t been there for you, and Oliver’s ready to rip my head off. He’s right. We….we both lost our parents, and we had to leave our home, and then I kind of just left you here and I’ve been a total jackass by doing that. I love you, Lyss. You’re my little sister, my best friend, and I’m going to try and be there for you more.” Felicity rolled onto her side to press a kiss to Tommy’s cheek, before wrapping her arms around him.

“I forgive you. I’m also impressed that Oliver paid enough attention to say anything to you.”

“Hey, come on, give me some credit.” Oliver said from the doorway, crossing the room to lay next to Felicity, wrapping an arm around her waist. Felicity giggled, content to be sandwiched in between the two men who meant the most to her. She yawned, realizing how tired she was as she listened to Tommy and Oliver talk, and she quickly fell asleep.

“Hey, Ollie?” Tommy asked after making sure Felicity was asleep, glancing at her. She’d rolled over in her sleep, face pressed into Oliver’s chest.

“Yeah?” He whispered back, brushing a piece of Felicity’s hair behind her ear before looking back at Tommy. He was surprised by the serious look on his best friend’s face, and he immediately shifted to give Tommy more of his attention, careful to not wake Felicity.

“If anything ever happens to me, promise me that you’ll watch out for her.” Oliver swallowed, watching Tommy sadly look over at his sister. Oliver knew that Tommy carried a heavy burden, taking care of his sister. Oliver, Moira, Thea, Laurel, and Sara…they were there to help but they weren’t family. Tommy was all Felicity had, and she was all he had.

“Yeah, of course, man. I love her, I’d do anything for her.” Tommy nodded, smiling slightly at Oliver before getting up, whispering goodnight as he walked out of the room. Oliver slowly unraveled himself from Felicity, shifting her so that she was on her pillow, pulling her glasses off of her face and setting them on her nightstand before he covered her in a blanket, telling her goodnight as he shut her door.

 

* * *

 

 

“Felicity Merlyn?” Felicity glanced up from her food, smiling at the boy standing next to her chair. He was tall, like Oliver, with an adorable smiling face, and she immediately knew that he was the human equivalent of a tiny puppy. “My name’s Barry Allen, I’m trying to get a group together for a tech project, and I heard you’re one of the best.”

“I’d have to agree with that. Our Lyss is a straight genius.” Tommy said proudly around a mouthful of food. Felicity snorted and shook her head, looking back up at Barry.

“I’m definitely interested.” She told him, smile growing as he beamed at her. Handing him her phone, she let him program in his number and agreed to make plans to meet the rest of the team.

“He’s adorable!” Laurel said, squeezing Felicity’s arm as she ignored Tommy’s look of horror. Felicity giggled slightly, unable to keep herself from blushing.

“He’s a nerd.” Oliver told them, moving to steal fries off of Felicity’s plate, who promptly smacked his hand out of the way.

“You have no problems with nerds when I’m helping you figure out the name of the girl you took on a date, whose name you can’t remember.” Tommy choked on his drink and was thumped on the back by a grumpy faced Oliver. Laurel dissolved into laughter, only increasing when Oliver sent her his patent glare. “It’s okay Oliver, I’m still your tech girl.”

“You’re damn right, Licity.” Felicity had said it jokingly, and was surprised that he had reacted the way he did. She was even more surprised when Oliver dropped a kiss on top of her head as he left, shooting a glare Barry’s way.

“Oh my God, he’s jealous!” Laurel exclaimed, clapping a hand over her mouth.

“Oh, come on, Oliver’s well on his way to dating every girl in our freshman class. I’m just his best friend, that’s all.” Felicity said, dipping a fry in ketchup and popping it into her mouth, studiously ignoring Laurel’s “lawyer face”. She and Oliver were strictly friends and Felicity never wanted to change that, for fear of something happening to their group. It wasn’t the first time that someone had made a comment about Oliver and Felicity’s relationship, and she knew it would only get worse the longer that they were friends. They’d grown up together, from the sandbox to the present, and maybe they didn’t have some of the boundaries that normal friendships had, but they had been through so much together that it was hard to think of acting any other way around each other.

“Is that what you want?” Laurel asked Felicity, watching the other girl for any of the telltale signs of her dishonesty. Felicity was a terrible liar, and everyone knew it.

“Of course.” Felicity responded, and it was the truth. She didn’t let herself even think about seeing Oliver as anything other than her best friend, because she was scared of what she would find if she did.

 

* * *

 

 

“Can you  believe the year is almost over?” Felicity asked, glancing up from her notes. They were studying, notes sprawled across the Queen living room. Oliver’s hair was standing up on end from the many times he’d run his hands through it, and Tommy was mouthing his notes to himself, interspersed with groans of frustration. Laurel was calm and relaxed, flipping through perfectly highlighted notes. Oliver sighed and pushed his papers away, rolling onto his back.

“Only 3 years and then we’re off to college.” Laurel said, unable to stop the smile from her face. She knew what she wanted to do, and she knew that she was going to college to be a lawyer. She was ready to find her place in the world and do something that was going to be worthwhile. Felicity, similarly, was ready to make her way to MIT. She was already well on her way to meeting the credentials she knew she would need, and nothing would ever make her happier than when she was working on her computers.

“Not for me.” Tommy said quietly, making a face at his notes again before looking up at Felicity’s shocked face. “I want to do something more. I want…I want to save people, to protect people. So I want to join the military.” Felicity could tell that he had given it much thought. Tommy had never been one to make rash decisions, and when he decided something it was hard to change his mind, and Felicity didn’t think that she wanted to. It was Tommy’s choice to dedicate his life to the military, and she could admit to herself that Tommy had always had it in him, that he always wanted to give his life for protecting others. How often had he and Oliver sat there, protecting her from invisible enemies?

“You’re going too, aren’t you?” She asked Oliver, catching his gaze and nodding to herself when she saw his expression. Tommy and Oliver were inseparable, she expected nothing else from the two of them. She would almost be angry if he wasn’t planning on going with Tommy, because someone had to be there to keep Tommy in line. “Well, all I have to say is that you two better start working out. You guys look like Steve Rogers pre-serum, they’ll never take you into the military looking like that.” Oliver burst out laughing, shaking his head as he lobbed a spare paper ball at Felicity.

“Thanks for the vote of confidence, ‘Licity.” He said, and she winked at him before smiling at Tommy, who looked almost relieved, like he had been worried about how Felicity would react. She stood to give him a hug, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

“I’m proud of you, big brother.” She whispered, and if he hugged her tighter, and if she heard a sniff, then who was she to point it out.


	4. You Know I Love You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY THAT THIS TOOK SO LONG DON'T HATE ME.

 

Felicity stood in front of her dresser, slowly straightening her curls. She did it rarely, because it took her too long, but she liked that it made her look older. They were halfway into sophomore year and Felicity was beginning to grow up faster. She spent long hours working on her projects, and her school work, and preparing a major project for her MIT resume. She was starting to grow out of her gawky, long-limbed bean pole body type, and she noticed herself slowly filling out. Her hips were starting to give her the semblance of curves, her chest slowly growing, and Moira had already given her most of “the talk”.

She was starting to develop a taste for dresses, and bright colored blouses with skirts, and Thea, with ever the interest in fashion, never hesitated to tell Felicity what outfits worked, and what didn’t. Laurel had been the one to show Felicity how to straighten her hair, during one of their many sleepovers, when they’d finally addressed the elephant in the room.

_“Laur, you know that if you and Tommy were to date, I wouldn’t care, right?” Felicity asked, refusing to meet Laurel’s gaze in the mirror. She picked at her nail polish, and chewed her lip, glad that Laurel didn’t stop playing with her hair._

_“I know, Fel. We’re not, by the way. Dating, I mean. I know it seems like it, and I’m not going to lie and say that I don’t want that more than anything, but I’m not pushing him. Losing your parents…it still hits him really hard. He hides it, just like you do, but I know that he still has a little ways to go before he gets over it. So, when that happens, and when he decides to make it official, then I’ll make sure you’re the first one to know. Sound good?” Felicity smiled, nodding and reaching behind her to gently squeeze Laurel’s hand._

_“Sounds great.”_

Felicity looked over at a knock on her door and smiled when she saw Oliver leaning against the doorframe. Oliver and Felicity were as close as they had always been, but Felicity couldn’t deny that it had become weird to share him. She wasn’t jealous, it wasn’t that, and she didn’t begrudge Oliver the opportunity for him to explore and find the person that he was destined to be with, but she never knew how to feel about the girls. Many of them didn’t like her, and while she thought it was pointless, she mostly understood it. They saw her as the competition, the girl standing between them and becoming Mrs. Queen, but what she didn’t understand was why they all thought that Oliver wanted her that way. No matter what anyone told her, no matter how many times Laurel said it to her, Felicity wouldn’t believe that Oliver felt that way.

“I thought you had a date tonight.” Felicity said as he crossed into her room, sitting on her bed before watching Felicity continue to do her hair. He’d always been fascinated by her hair, how blonde it was and how it always curled perfectly. It was weird to see straighten it; he had spent the past however many years watching her run around with curls. He’d always been fascinated by them, and when he was younger he had gotten into the habit of pulling on them to get her attention. Doing stupid things to get her attention had always been his forte. It didn’t matter that they were already friends, or that he already knew everything about her. He would never stop wanting to be the object of Felicity’s attention. She was steady and constant and the sturdiest rock that he had ever leaned on, and he knew that without her his life would be completely different.

“Yeah, she dumped me.” He said without any emotion, like he was talking about the weather. He caught her eye roll in the mirror, and couldn’t keep the smile off of his face. He knew that Felicity buried her disdain for the airheaded girls that he dated, and she did it well, but he knew her better that anyone else did. “How’s Barry?” he asked, picking at a piece of fuzz on Felicity’s blanket. He didn’t understand what his concern was with Barry and Felicity, and how much time they had been spending together. He rationalized his concern with the fact that other than Tommy, he was the closest thing that he was to her family.

“Barry is fine, Oliver, as always. Try not to scare him off, okay? You intimidate him. He’s a good guy.” She refused to let Oliver break eye contact through the mirror, and eventually, Oliver sighed.

“Fine, Licity, I’ll stop scaring him. I promise.” Felicity smiled, content, missing the flash of something unreadable on Oliver’s face.

 

* * *

 

 

 

“So, Caitlin, have you always lived in Starling? I kind of can’t believe I haven’t ever seen you around.” Felicity said, snagging a handful of popcorn from the bowl in the middle of the table. Barry had introduced her to Caitlin and Cisco a few weeks before, so that they could work on the tech project Barry had come up with. They were each part of a different area of technology; Barry wanted to work with forensics, Caitlin wanted to study to be a doctor, and Cisco was into engineering technology, but they all meshed somehow. They were going to help each other create individual projects that would help them get into the colleges they wanted most.

“No, I actually lived in Central City, but a lot of things happened with my family so we moved. Fresh starts and all that.” Felicity nodded, knowing that Caitlin was avoiding a subject but also knowing not to push it. She acted the same way when her parents were brought up, or when someone asked why she lived with the Queens.

“You too, Cisco?” Cisco nodded, casting a glance at Caitlin. She loved Caitlin and Cisco’s dynamic. She loved how they finished each other’s sentences and made nerdy references that only they understood, and how they could always talk to each other without speaking. “Well, I’m glad that you guys are here.” They smiled at her, and Felicity felt an odd flame of happiness shoot through her. She felt at home with three people who had come together because they had no one else. She felt at home with people who understood her babbles, and could talk back to her about it. She loved that Tommy, and Oliver, and Thea and Sara indulged her and all of her technology, but they could never speak back, or challenge her about it.

“So. I know that we are gathered for this project meeting but I’m thinking that we need to do something first, and that is force Caitlin to watch every episode of Smallville ever made.” Cisco said, pulling a mass of boxed collections out of his bag. Felicity squealed, gushing to Caitlin about how attractive Superman was while Barry scoffed, laughing when Felicity punched his leg.

She laughed when they all piled onto the couch, Barry resting an arm on the couch behind her as Cisco pulled the popcorn onto his lap next to her. She smiled up at Barry, heart fluttering slightly in her chest when he gave her the small smile that he reserved for her. She wasn’t sure if anything was going to happen with Barry, and she wasn’t sure what she wanted to happen with Barry, but what she knew was that what she felt with Barry was what she denied with Oliver, and she would chase her happiness with the only person that could give it to her.

 

* * *

 

 

The rest of sophomore year passed quickly, almost too quickly for anyone to really realize that they were running out of time before the rest of their lives began. Felicity took Oliver and Tommy’s wish to join the army seriously, looking into all of their options and making sure that they were educated enough to not “look like a bunch of brick-headed jocks like you normally do”, at least according to Thea. Everyone could tell that it put a strain on Felicity, who looked at the next two years as a ticking time bomb. She had never been without Tommy and Oliver for more than a few days since they had become friends, and faced with the prospect of months without contact, she found herself scared and nervous. Barry tried to keep her mind off of things with their project, and found that he succeeded. Felicity was hard wired to give her all into her talent, and, when, hours after she had shown up at Barry’s stressed out and worried she came back to herself, she couldn’t help but give him a tired smile.

Summer found Felicity at Barry’s more and more, her glasses pushed up into her hair as she rubbed her eyes. Barry quietly placed a cup of coffee in front of her, pushing a strand of hair behind her ear. “Do you want to talk about it?” he asked her, kneeling next to her chair and spinning her so that she faced him. He was surprised to see that her eyes were bright with tears, threatening to spill down her flushed cheeks.

“I just…I can’t lose either of them. Tommy is my brother, the only person whose been there since day one, and Oliver is....he’s…”

“He’s the love of your life, Felicity.” Feliciy sucked in a short breath, tears finally spilling over as she looked at Barry. “I know how you feel about him. I could tell by the look on your face, because Caitlin says it’s the same look that I get when I see Iris.” He told her gently, thumb wiping at a tear off of her cheek.

“Sometimes I wish I didn’t. It’s never going to work, and I-I want to try with someone else.” She whispered, like she couldn’t quite bring herself to speak the words out loud.

“We’d be doomed to fail, Fel.” Barry told her with a small smile, leaning closer to her so that he could see the tears on her lashes. “I want to try with you too, though.”

Felicity’s lips turned up at the ends moments before Barry leaned forward and kissed her, his hand still resting on her cheek. His lips were warm and soft against hers, and she carefully wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling back to rest her forehead against his.

“Doomed to fail, huh?” She asked him, giggling at the ridiculous grin on his face.

“I like impossible odds.”

 

* * *

 

 

Oliver, weary and exhausted from a day at school and problems with his latest ex-girlfriend, dropped his bag on the table closest to the door, mindlessly trudging into the kitchen to pour himself a glass of water. He couldn’t understand why every girl was surprised when things didn’t work out between them. Oliver had never lasted more than a month or two with any girl at his school, and he had a reputation for that. He knew that rotating through girls like some people rotated through clothing made him look shallow and simple minded, but the reality of the matter was that Oliver had quickly realized that no girl could hold a candle to Felicity. He couldn’t bring himself to put in the effort into finding another girl that understood him the way Felicity did. She knew his likes and dislikes and she read him so easily that he never had to worry about explaining himself to her. He knew that most of his girlfriends were concerned by how close the two were, but he saw how happy she was with Barry; how excited she was that she had someone who could keep up with her when she got all adorable and babbled about computers, and he couldn’t understand why everyone was so worried. She was obviously in a happy relationship, and was nothing more that Oliver’s best friend.

He sighed, setting his glass on the counter, and then leaned forward to gently, but repeatedly, bash his head against the counter. He glanced up when he heard a throat clear, mildly annoyed when he saw Thea. It wasn’t that they didn’t get along, because they did. Oliver had grown up and realized that no one would accept him the way his family did, and in turn he’d come to accept Thea and all of her quirks with nothing but a smirk or a sigh, but he was exhausted and Thea had her scary face on.

“Did something bad happen between Barry and Felicity?” She asked, crossing her arms and eyeing Oliver speculatively. Oliver’s face went from guarded caution to complete confusion, raising an eyebrow as he rested his arms on the counter.

“Not that I know, why?” Thea glared at him, as if to figure out if he was lying before she responded.

“Because she’s been super pissy all day and no one knows why.” Oliver thought about everything that was going on in their lives, from school assignments to the spectacle that was Laurel and Tommy, and how much she just wanted her brother to be happy. He thought about the past month, if anything had been building to cause such an outburst, and then he laughed. “What? Why are you laughing?” Thea asked, coming closer to rest her hands on the other side of the counter.

“Thea, she’s just PMS-ing. I’ll text Barry to come bring her ice cream and she’ll be just fine.” Oliver said, pulling his phone out of his pocket and sending a quick text to Barry before slipping his phone back into his pocket. Satisfied that he had solved the mystery, he downed the rest of his water. Setting the glass in the sink, he moved to leave the kitchen, humming a tune under his breath, when he was stopped by Thea stepping into his way. He glanced down at his sister, immediately concerned by the shocked look on her face. “What, Thea? What is it?”

“Holy shit.”

“What?!”

“You’re…you’re in love with Felicity. You know her period cycle, for God’s sake. Oh, you’ve got it bad.” Oliver froze, mouth gaping as he floundered for a train of thought, of something to say that could dispute the conclusion that Thea had reached. She was obviously wrong. Spluttering, Oliver blurted the only thing that came to mind.

“Thea, watch your language.” She laughed, patting Oliver on the cheek with the self-satisfied air of a younger sibling who had the upper hand against their older sibling.

“Oh, Ollie.” She said, sounding almost sorry for her brother. And she did feel sorry, because she had pretty much known the entire time how Oliver felt, and she was almost as certain of Felicity’s feelings, but she knew that neither of them were ever going to come to the conclusion on their own, too scared of the potential consequences. Oliver took advantage of the doorbell ringing to sprint away from Thea, away from the kitchen where the air felt stifling and thick. He let Barry into the house with a dazed and confused presence, leading Barry up the stairs to Felicity’s room with appropriate nods in time to Barry’s monologue. He let Barry knock on her door, and he watched as her face brightened when she saw Barry waiting at her door with her favorite ice cream and flowers. Her face transformed into a genuine smile, as she hugged Barry, mouthing a thank you to Oliver around Barry. He shouldn’t have been surprised that she knew he was behind it, but all he did was give her a small smile, leaving her room and closing the door behind him. He could hear her bubbling laughter follow him down the hall, and when he reached his room and fell into bed, fully clothed, he sighed and stared up at the ceiling; the revelation hitting him like a ton of bricks.

‘I’m in love with Felicity.’ He thought.

‘I’m fucked.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys, I honestly don't know how to tell you how sorry I am that this took so long. I'm nowhere near happy with this chapter and Tommy isn't even really in it like wtf am I doing but I have been having such a difficult time with my muse and it took my personal love life taking a nose dive for me to finish this chapter. I hope to be working on this more the next few days so you should have another chapter soon with lots of Tommy. Thank you guys for being so patient with me, and I hope that this chapter was good enough for you.


	5. I Choose You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the longest chapter yet and it's just everyone bonding and I hope you guys love it

Realizing that he was in love with Felicity had not gone well for Oliver. He felt paranoid and stressed and even scared. He was scared that every move he made would cause Felicity to realize, but he couldn’t bring himself to separate from her for more than a few hours at a time. He still called her angel, he still brought her breakfast in bed when she overslept before school, and went with her to her parents’ graves. He couldn’t stomach the idea of her not having someone to do all of those things for her, and a part of him knew that he could easily tell Barry that someone needed to help her with all of those things, but Oliver was selfish. He wanted to keep a part of Felicity as his Felicity. The one thing that he would always have over Barry was that he had been in love with her first, regardless of what kind of love it was. Felicity was a part of him that he loved best, and even though the time that they spent together wasn’t as much as he wished it was, he cherished every second.

Thea had kept her realization quiet, and Oliver was thankful that even though he knew he didn’t spend nearly enough time with her, she loved him just the same. Thea was there for him to confide in when his feelings got the best of him and he withdrew to protect himself. He thought it was almost laughable that he dreamed of going into the military to serve his country, but he was so scared of Felicity finding out how he felt about her that instead of going out with her, Barry, and their group of friends, he was instead on his couch with Thea, eating ice cream and watching The Notebook (he would deny until the day he died that he had shed even one tear, no matter what Thea said). Tommy had come in for a few minutes, staying long enough to tease Oliver.

“The Notebook? Dude, do you feel okay? Did someone take your testicles?” Oliver narrowed his eyes at Tommy, pouting like a child.

“Yeah, man, Laurel has them at her house on a shelf right next to yours.” Tommy flipped him the bird, walking out of the room as Thea cackled.

“Good one, big brother. Now you have to go talk to him though and convince him to get his head out of his ass, because the UST between him and Laurel is enough to give anyone a complex and if Sara has to deal with it anymore she’s gonna vomit and I don’t want to see that.” Thea smiled sweetly at Oliver as she took his bowl into the kitchen, nudging him off the couch with her foot. “Seriously, I mean it, this is your job as best friend. Where would you be without me, Ollie?”

“Blissfully ignorant.” He bit out. Thea clicked her tongue once, before shrugging and leaving the room, humming a happy tune. Oliver grumbled under his breath as he went upstairs to find Tommy, not really feeling like having a huge emotional conversation, because as they had grown older it had been harder to maintain the heart to hearts that they had always had. Felicity usually mediated and forced everyone to talk about their feelings but that was beside the point. Oliver knocked on Tommy’s room, sticking his head in when he called out. “Hey, man. I’m sorry about what I said earlier.” Oliver said, digging his toe into the carpet as he avoided direct eye contact with Tommy. He wasn’t always the best at expressing his feelings, and he knew that Thea would scoff if she heard him say that because according to Thea he had the feeling expression of a boulder, which he thought wasn’t fair, because he wasn’t _that_ bad, but all of that was irrelevant when he saw Tommy shrug halfheartedly, rolling over to bury his face in his pillows. “What’s wrong, Tommy? Did something happen with Laurel?”

Tommy groaned dramatically, rolling back over and glaring at the ceiling. “Nothing fucking happened, that’s the point! I keep messing things up every time I want to try to tell her how I feel, and I want it to be perfect and-“

“Tommy! Breathe, dude.” Oliver held his hands up as he came to sit on the edge of Tommy’s bed, a serious look on his face. “It doesn’t need to be perfect, you know that Laurel feels the same. She’s just been patiently waiting for you to get your head out of your ass. I know that you’re scared about it but there’s no point. You guys have pretty much been together the whole time anyway, regardless of whether or not that had a label. It’s going to be totally fine. Just tell her how you really feel, that’s all you need to do.” Tommy looked at Oliver speculatively, wondering when his best friend had gotten so wise. Tommy loved Oliver, but Oliver was known for going through girls at record speeds. He was always honest with them about where he thought the relationship would go but it was never any different. Each girl would think that they would be the one to tame Oliver Queen, that they would be the one to succeed where no one else had, and each time Tommy watched another girl profess that she would hate Oliver Queen for the rest of her life. That usually only lasted for a week or two before they came back, but Tommy could tell that Oliver was trying to change. It had only started recently, and it had been in the back of Tommy’s mind that he really needed to ask Oliver what had made him decide to turn over a new leaf. He knew that there had lately been a disconnect between himself, Oliver and Felicity. Oliver had drawn into himself, and spent most of his time with Thea, who always looked at him with a small sympathetic glint in her eyes. Felicity spent a lot of time with Barry, and Caitlin and Cisco working on whatever project they had going on that week. He knew that Felicity really cared about Barry, and he was glad to see her happy, but he always felt slightly confused, because for years she’d had feelings for Oliver. Tommy wasn’t stupid, or oblivious, and he noticed more than he let on. Felicity was his sister, his best friend, and he knew her better than anyone else did, so he knew how she felt about Oliver, and he had always known. He knew better than to push it, but he secretly hoped that they would end up together.

“Yeah, that’s….that’s really good advice. Thanks man.” He sat up, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his legs, fiddling with the blanket, trying to figure out how to word his next question. It was past time that he figured out what was wrong with Oliver, and work harder on making sure that he was there for his best friend and his sister. “Are you okay, though? You’ve been pretty weird lately. Did something happen with Helena or something?” Tommy knew it had nothing to do with Helena, because he had heard her cursing Oliver’s name in the hallways this morning, but he figured that it might be easier for Oliver to talk if he had somewhere to start.

“I, um. It’s not Helena, it’s…I…” Oliver hesitated, looking anywhere but to Tommy. He didn’t know how he felt about telling Tommy what he had so recently realized, because in a way, telling Tommy was as terrifying as telling Felicity herself. Tommy was her brother, the one who had protected her from day one, and if Tommy didn’t approve, or didn’t think that Oliver was right for Felicity, then it would all be over before it had even begun, and the thought of losing Felicity, without ever even having her, made his heart freeze in his chest. “Tommy, I’m-“

“Ollie, come on, spit it out. You know that I don’t care, whatever happened. You’re my best friend.” Tommy said, reaching over to put a hand on Oliver’s shoulder. He had never seen Oliver so distraught, and he was glad that he had finally decided to talk to him about it, to reach out and make sure that Oliver was okay. Oliver had a tendency to hide his feelings, and that might explain why he had been with Thea so much lately. Oliver loved his little sister, and they got along amazingly, but they had been inseparable the past week.

“I’m in love with Felicity.” He said quietly, and calmly, as if finally admitting it out loud made the weight of the world fall off of his shoulders. Where he had been tense and jittery just before he said it, afterwards he had a look of complete and utter Zen on his face, and Tommy knew that he wasn’t kidding. Somewhere in between all of the things they had gone through together, from playing as kids, to Oliver going with her to the cemetery, he had fallen in love with Tommy’s sister. Tommy smiled, and Oliver couldn’t help his answering grin, feeling more relief than he thought he ever could. “You’re smiling. That’s a good sign.”

“I think it’s great. You’ve always been there for her just as much as I have, if not more. You were the one that took her to the cemetery when I wasn’t ready to face that. She’s always relied on you just as much as she has me and I couldn’t ask for anyone better to be in love with my sister.” Tommy said, clapping Oliver on the back before standing up. “We’re going to continue this conversation, but for now I have a Laurel Lance to ask to be my girlfriend. Wish me luck.”

“You’ve got this, Tommy.” Oliver said with a chuckle, standing up swing an arm around his best friend’s shoulder as he led him downstairs towards the front door. “Go get her, Tiger.”

Tommy vaguely looked like he wanted to throw up as he headed out of the door, towards his car so he could drive over to the Lances. Laurel’s dad was intimidating on a good day, and he hoped that he would play nice with Tommy today.  Felicity had just pulled into the driveway as Tommy drove away, eyes forward and focused with a newly found determination written on his face.

“Where’s Tommy going? He looked like he wanted to either kick someone’s ass or puke on their shoes.” Felicity asked, taking off her coat as she walked through the open front door. Oliver took the coat from her, hanging it in the closet on the right side of the foyer, as he chuckled, wrapping an arm around Felicity’s shoulders and pulling her to his side. They watched Tommy’s taillights until they couldn’t see them anymore before Oliver thought to answer. Felicity had settled into Oliver’s side, an arm around his waist, her body pressed against his side. It had been a while since they had been in each other’s company like this, relaxed with nowhere to go, and no one else around, much in the same way that it had been too long since he had been with Tommy.

“He’s going to finally tell Laurel that he loves her. I’m really proud of him. They grow up so fast.” Felicity snorted, wrapping her other arm around his waist as well. He moved his arms to her waist, resting his cheek against the top of her head and breathing her in, trying to ignore how well she fit against him. She sighed, nuzzling her head against his neck.

“I’ve missed you, Oliver. I know that we live in the same house, but we’ve all been so busy lately and it’s just weird.” He squeezed her tighter for a second, pulling back slightly to look at her. She looked peaceful, and calm, and Oliver had never felt a stronger urge to kiss her. Growing up over the years he had thought about it, always in a fleeting, barely there moment, which he had never really questioned. He wondered how much of his denial about his feelings for Felicity he had never noticed, and he wondered what could’ve happened if he had realized sooner, before Barry, before all of the meaningless girls he had been with.

“I’ve missed you too, Licity. Let’s go on a roadtrip somewhere. Me, you, and Tommy. It’s junior year, I don’t want to waste the last time that Tommy and I have before we enlist. Then this summer, we’re going to Europe. I’ll talk to mom about it, and she can plan the whole thing.” Felicity’s face lit up, and she nodded enthusiastically, leaning up to kiss Oliver on the cheek. He worked hard to hide his blush, and he was glad that Felicity shifted to rest her head back on his chest.

“This weekend, we’ll road trip somewhere. Just us three.” She said contentedly, sighing as she moved to close the door. “Let’s go watch a movie.” They ended up falling asleep sprawled on the couch, Felicity’s legs across Oliver’s lap, her head on his shoulder. When he finally got home, Tommy laughed and snapped a picture before covering them with a blanket, making a point to send the picture to Oliver.

 

* * *

 

 

Laurel had just had a long talk with Sara about her and Thea terrorizing Oliver about his feelings for Felicity, which they all knew about because they weren’t stupid, or oblivious, and even though Laurel had no idea how it had taken so long for Oliver to realize it, she didn’t see the point in traumatizing the poor child. She sighed as she trudged into her room, throwing her hair up into a bun, and pulling on her sweatpants and a sweatshirt of Tommy’s she had stolen. She needed to give it back to him, if only so that he would wear it for a few hours before he gave it back so that it smelled like him. She had been telling herself more and more that she was okay that there was no label, and that it didn’t matter if they were boyfriend and girlfriend, because it didn’t stop how much they cared about each other. She knew that Tommy was the most amazing man, and that she was unendingly proud of him for all that he had accomplished, and would accomplish. They spent most of their time together, and she always missed him right after he left. She missed the way that he knew how to read her like a book, and the way that he teased her endlessly, but in the best way, because he made her laugh about the things she didn’t like about herself, and it changed everything about her perception of who she was. Tommy had helped her grow up into someone who was at peace with themself, and she didn’t know how to thank him.

“Laurel! Tommy’s here.” Sara called from down the hall, and she heard a gentle knock on her door moments later. Sitting up with a smile, she called out for him to come in, smile widening at the look he always gave her when he first saw her, like he had been away from her for too long and needed to take her in again.

“Hey, Tommy.” She said, curling against his side when he propped himself up against the headboard of her bed. He pulled her to his side, pressing a kiss to her hair.

“So, Laurel. I’m going to tell you something.” Laurel’s heart clenched in her chest momentarily, like she was scared of what he was going to say, and part of her was. She was never sure if the scales tipped, if they would tip the way that she wanted them to. Logically she knew that Tommy cared about her, greatly, but it seemed like any time they got close, Tommy would back off. “Stop chewing your lip, I know you do that when you’re stressing and there’s no reason to. I just wanted to tell you that I’ve been stupid. Like, really, really, stupid. I kept wanting everything to be perfect when I finally managed to spit out the words that I love you, and I have loved you what feels like my whole life. I can’t tell you the amount of times that I have thought about what would happen if you hadn’t had class with Felicity, and honestly, I don’t think I would be who I am today if it wasn’t for you. You’ve stood by me through everything, for so long, and I wanted to make everything perfect when I asked you to be my girlfriend because I should’ve done it so long ago, and then the more I waited the more I was scared to mess it up because you deserve the world, Laur, you’re amazing and I love you-“ Laurel turned to Tommy, grabbing his face and kissing him as she kneeled next to him, his hands slipping to her waist to pull her closer. She slid her hands into his hair, smiling against his mouth, pulling away to rest her forehead against his.

“I love you, too, you giant dork.” She giggled, her lips brushing against his again as she continued to whisper how much she loved him.

 

* * *

 

 

Oliver woke up the next morning to the sounds of his mother, Raisa, and Tommy in the kitchen. Felicity was still asleep on his shoulder, her arms wrapped around his arm, and her legs across his lap. He had never felt more content, and his heart ached in his chest when he had to face the fact that he couldn’t have this all the time. He had forgotten how easily he slept with her next to him. He did his best to gently shift her so that she was laying on the couch, her head propped up against one of the pillows. He draped the blanket back over her, quickly pressing a cheek to her forehead before he could talk himself out of it. Walking into the kitchen he pulled Tommy into a headlock, rubbing his hair until Tommy yelled.

“How’d it go with Laurel, dude?” He asked, grabbing a cup of coffee before sitting down at the island. His mother looked on at them with a small smile, shaking her head before kissing each of them on the cheek and heading off to work.

“It went great. She told me I was an idiot for waiting so long, which, you already did. But really Ollie, I owe you one. You made me get my head out of my ass and I can’t thank you enough.” Oliver smiled at Tommy over his cup, shaking his head. Tommy didn’t owe him anything, and if he was honest, the past 24 hours had been some of the best he’d had recently.

“Stop, Tommy, you don’t owe me anything.”

“I know, but I got you something anyway. Check your phone.” Oliver pulled his phone out of his back pocket, where it had been all night, and thumbed open the message from Tommy, smiling at the picture of him and Felicity asleep on the couch. He set the picture as his background, knowing that he would have to be careful who saw it, in case they got the wrong idea, but he knew that having that picture would make him smile every time he looked at it.

“Thank you, Tommy.”

“Don’t sweat it. Now let’s have some quality time shooting shit on the Xbox with the volume too loud until Felicity comes in to yell at us.”

“I though you’d never ask.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter was written today in my time between classes, and I haven't really beta'd it that much so excuse any of the mistakes that may be in here. I hope you guys love it, and I hope to keep updates quicker than they have been! (: as always, you can find me at ollie-and-licity on tumblr!


	6. Sunsets and Silhouette Dreams

“Oliver! Stop. Fidgeting!” Felicity hissed, slapping his hands away from his mouth. Oliver pouted, before sighing heavily and shifting in his seat again.

“I’m sorry, angel, I’m nervous, and everything rides on this and if I mess up everyone’s going to think I’m stupid, and-“ Felicity clapped her hand over Oliver’s mouth, bending forward so that they were eye to eye. Oliver tried not to focus on the fact that he could see every single color in her eyes, that her lips were just on the other side of her hand, that all that was separating them was two inches of empty space.

“You’re not stupid, Oliver. You’re not going to mess this up. We studied for this. You’re ready. You just have to believe in yourself, like I believe in you.” She told him, raising an eyebrow at the end like she was waiting for him to contradict her. He sighed again, relaxing in his seat as Felicity moved her hand off of his mouth, instead resting her hands on his shoulders. “Go get ‘em, Tiger.” She said with a small smile, cupping his face in her hands.

Oliver stood, wiping his hands on his pants, shaking out his shoulders, and bouncing from foot to foot before he bent down to kiss Felicity on the cheek, walking into the room with shoulders back, and head held high. Oliver was taking the ASVAB today, which would help the Army determine which jobs Oliver would be best at. Tommy was taking his at the same time, but he had gotten to school hours before everyone else, so Felicity and Laurel had to wish him luck the night before. Tommy had always been weird about big tests, avoiding everyone for hours before and hours after.

“You’d think he was walking in there to die.” Laurel said, walking up next to her and slipping her arm through Felicity’s. Felicity snorted, leaning her head against Laurel’s as they watched Oliver through the window.

“He’s all grown up, taking a big test like a big boy.” Felicity cooed, and Oliver glanced at them through the window, narrowing his eyes while Felicity and Laurel beamed at him. The school year was disappearing faster than they knew how to handle, and they were all faced with the very real idea that next year they would be off to college. Felicity was set to hand in her application to MIT on the early admission deadline, and even though it was almost a year away, she had already finished all of it, and kept revising it every three days. Laurel had decided on going to Harvard Law, in order to follow her dream of being a lawyer. Tommy and Oliver would enlist after graduation, and go through 14 weeks of training that would combine their basic training, as well as their advanced training, to prepare them for the field that they hoped they would be in: infantry. Felicity had tried not to freak out when Oliver and Tommy had told her that infantry was what they had chosen, because she had done her research, and she knew that chances were high that they would get deployed. The war had been escalating for years, and Felicity knew every statistic there was to know about the army and the war. She would be lying if she said that Oliver hadn’t found her crying later that evening, and that she had spent the rest of the night tucked in between Tommy and Oliver on the couch watching Love Actually.

“I can’t believe there’s so little time left, Fel. This summer’s going to be our last one all together for who knows how long.” Felicity bit her bottom lip as it wobbled, squeezing Laurel tighter as they turned to walk to their cars. They had only gotten up that morning to bring Oliver and make sure he didn’t throw up anywhere, but they both knew that they would spend the rest of the day together crying and eating junk food as they watched movies.

“God, I hate them. I’m so proud of them, but I hate them. Why couldn’t they have gone to business school or something? My hair’s going to go grey. I’m not even 18 and I’m going to have grey hair.” She wailed as they climbed into her red Mini Cooper that Moira had told Felicity she just needed to get. In the back of her mind, Felicity knew that she was unendingly happy that Oliver and Tommy had found something so meaningful and worthwhile to dedicate their time to, but she was more scared than she had ever been in her entire life. Felicity had been a worrier from day one, but losing her parents had increased it. Her friends let her fret because they knew that she needed to, but they knew that they always had to keep an eye on her because she could get lost in analyzing the what-ifs. Laurel gently squeezed Felicity’s hand where it rested on the gear shift, offering Felicity a reassuring smile when she looked over.

“They’re going to be just fine, Fel. Don’t you worry.”

 

* * *

 

 

When Felicity went back to school on Monday, she was pulled out of class, and into the main office for the first time since her parents had died, when the principal had tried to convince her to talk to the school counselor weekly. While it had been a different school, it still made her anxious. She was even more confused when she ran into Barry, who was standing just inside the door.

“Hey, what are we here for?” Felicity asked Barry, casting wary glances around as their principal walked in.

“I’m glad you asked that, Miss. Smoak. You two are here because I’m going to offer you two an opportunity that not many students get. In fact, you two would be the first, followed by Miss. Snow and Mr. Ramon. You two have amassed enough credits, and done some really incredible projects outside of school that your future colleges have noticed. We’re giving you guys the opportunity to graduate early. You would be graduating at the end of this year, a year early, with the ability to go to your schools starting in the fall.” Felicity froze, her entire body going numb, hundreds of thoughts chasing themselves through her mind. Barry cast her a wide-eyed glance, understanding and sympathy visible in his gaze, before he turned back to give his answer.

“I want to.” Barry said eagerly, and Felicity tuned them out as they talked about paperwork, and parent permission. Her mind was reeling, and she felt like she’d had too many things thrown upon her the past few days.

“I need to think about it.” Felicity blurted as she ran from the room, not stopping until she had reached her car. She was angry that the world had chosen now to give her the opportunity to graduate early, something that she had wanted to accomplish in college, before she set out to start her own tech firm. She was angry that she knew that Barry was leaving, because she knew that they would end their relationship, even though they both knew that it wasn’t a real relationship. They had kissed a few times, and they had spent countless hours curled up together, but neither of them felt as much for each other as they felt for other people. She knew that they would stay great friends, and she wished him all the best, but she knew that she couldn’t do this. Tommy had sacrificed so much for her over the years, and had done so much for her, that she couldn’t let herself leave him in Starling with no family. Oliver and Thea were amazing, and Moira had accepted them as much as she accepted her own children, but there was nothing that could replace Tommy as her brother, or her as his sister. She wouldn’t leave until they were all leaving, together but separate.

Barry gently knocked on her window, and Felicity leaned over to let him into her car, and she didn’t realize she had started crying until he leaned over to wipe the tears off of her cheeks.

“Felicity…I know what you’re thinking. I know you. And I want you to know that it’s okay to not want to do this. No one is going to judge you for staying home for Tommy and Oliver. What they’re doing…it’s amazing, Felicity. You should stay, you should be here for them until they leave. I know this isn’t what you want. But I do. And I know what you’re thinking about that, too. I had the best time with you as my girlfriend, Felicity, but more than that you’re the best friend I’ve ever had, and you better stay in touch with me while I’m gone.” Felicity was in hysterics by the end of Barry’s speech, sobbing into his shirt as he rubbed a hand gently up and down her back. She couldn’t pinpoint why she was crying, or which feeling to deal with first. She wished that she could love Barry like he deserved. She wished that she could take her feelings for Oliver and turn them into feelings that could make her happy with what she had. Barry was supportive, and kind, and he understood everything that she ever talked about. He could keep up with her on almost every subject, but he wasn’t Oliver. They had been through so much together, things that no one their age should’ve had to go through, and she had seen an amazingly different side of him lately. He had stopped sleeping his way through all the girls in their school, and he had made an effort to spend more time with her and Tommy. They were inseparable, just like when they were kids, and Felicity had never been happier.

“I love you, Barry. You’re going to do such amazing things.” She whispered against his collar bone, wiping at her face with her sweater. Barry smiled at her, tucking her hair behind her ear, placing a chaste, gentle kiss against her lips before he climbed out of her car. Felicity spent 20 minutes in the car, struggling to calm herself down, before she was in control of herself enough to walk back into the office.

“I won’t be graduating early. If MIT is okay with it, I would like to defer my acceptance until I graduate with the rest of my class.”

 

* * *

 

“What’s going on, Felicity? You’ve been so weird all day and I don’t know how to handle it.” Tommy said, coming to a standstill in front of her, hands in his pockets and his face furrowed, like it physically pained him to know that something was wrong with his sister, and he didn’t know. Oliver stood next to him, completely silent, just watching and waiting for her to speak. She had to make sure to keep her eyes on Tommy, aware that Oliver was studying her, and knowing that if she looked over at him, he would see something in her eyes that she couldn’t explain.

“Today, I got an offer from MIT, through the high school. They saw that I had enough credits to graduate this year, and come to school a year early.” No one spoke for a few seconds, before Oliver broke.

“That’s great, Licity! You’re going to have so much fun, and everyone’s going to be so blown away by how smart you are, and you’re going to take over the world one day.” Oliver realized somewhere in the back on his mind that he was rambling, just like Felicity always did, and maybe they were spending too much time together because he really couldn’t stop talking, and he was hoping that his voice was even, and covering up the fear he felt in losing Felicity before he could bring himself to tell her, because he had come so close so many times, but he could never justify doing it when Felicity was with Barry, and now he was going to lose her to MIT before he was ready, and he knew it was selfish because this is exactly what Felicity deserved, a chance to show everyone how amazing she was, and he couldn’t be mad about that. In fact, he had never been more proud of her. But his hands shook as he put them into his pockets, and he knew then that whatever happened, whatever Felicity chose, it was past time that he told her how he felt.

“I told them no.” She whispered, finally making eye contact with Oliver, just in time to see his face relax with relief, and she bit her lip, because a part of her wanted to tell Oliver that she couldn’t leave him before she had the chance to tell him that she loved him, but the words froze in her throat, and she glanced down at her lap. “I don’t want to leave while you guys are still here. I want to graduate with you guys, and Laurel. I can’t be away from you guys yet.”

“Lyss…are you sure? This is MIT. This is your dream school.” Tommy said, dropping next to her on the couch, and he surreptitiously cast a glance in Oliver’s direction. Tommy was torn, because he wanted to push his sister to be the best that she could be, because she was the smartest person that he had ever met, and Felicity deserved everything the world had to offer her, and Tommy refused to be the reason she gave those things up.

She wrapped her arms around Tommy’s waist, resting her head against his shoulder, and he pulled her closer to his side with a small smile, throwing an arm around her shoulders and kissing the top of her head. Oliver finally brought himself to move, as he leaned against Felicity’s other side, his arms wrapping around her waist, and he let out a small, content sigh that Felicity almost missed, but she turned her head to kiss his cheek as he does it.

“I’m really sure.” She says, happy to be sandwiched in between the people she loves most. They stay on the couch like that for hours, mindlessly watching movies, more focused on the people beside them than anything on screen.

 

* * *

 

 

It felt like the blink of an eye before summer was upon them, and it was the best summer any of them had ever had. Tommy, Laurel, Oliver and Felicity had traveled across the United States, hitting every National Park along the way. They spent a week in Yellowstone, a few days at Mount Rushmore, two weeks hiking along the Grand Canyon; and they had hundreds of pictures to prove it. They all knew, deep down, that it would be the last time for a long while that they could be so free, so able to do whatever they wanted to do. Tommy and Laurel had spent a week separate from Oliver and Felicity, and that week that Oliver spent every waking second with Felicity were the best and worst of his life. Felicity, in workout gear, with a bandana holding her hair back, sweat glistening on her skin, was the biggest temptation of Oliver’s life. He couldn’t stop looking at her lips, or her neck, or her ass when she started climbing a boulder configuration in front of him. More than once, he would hold her hand to help her over a fallen tree, or pull her up a rock that was too big for her, and each time, her cheeks would flush and her breathing would accelerate, and if his hand lingered on hers for too long, there was no one to blame him but her.

Summer ended with a trip to the beach, sand and sun and salt taking over all of their senses. Laurel tanned without trying, while Felicity sat next to her, trying desperately to keep herself from getting sunburnt. Tommy and Oliver frequently joined beach volleyball games, much to the chagrin of the two girls. Tommy had to hit Oliver in the shoulder more than once to get his attention back to the game, and not ogling his sister, which Tommy really didn’t want to think about, because he might want them to end up together, but that didn’t mean that he wanted to even think about what Oliver was thinking when he looked at Felicity like that.

Their last night before they were supposed to travel home, they went to the fanciest restaurant they had at the beach, dressing up in their best. Tommy and Oliver both wore suits, and even though Laurel and Felicity had both seen them in suits before, it didn’t change the fact that it took their breath away every time. Laurel wore a floor length red gown, which set her tan off nicely, her sun-lightened hair falling down her back in loose, wavy curls. Felicity wore a long black dress that left her entire back bare, her hair up and in a bun, swept away from her face and neck. Oliver would be lying if he said that he didn’t think Felicity was the most gorgeous girl he’d ever seen.

He said as much, when they split up to take walks after dinner. Oliver and Felicity were walking in the sand, shoes held in their hands as they walked close enough to the water to get their toes wet, the sun setting in the background. Felicity was laughing at a joke Oliver had made, when he couldn’t contain himself any longer. He stepped in front of Felicity, cupping his hand against her cheek before he leaned down and kissed her, pulling her closer with a hand on her waist. Felicity dropped her shoes immediately, fisting her hands in Oliver’s jacket, sliding her tongue against his lower lip. She couldn’t get close enough to Oliver, she couldn’t get enough of his lips on hers, his hands on her waist, in her hair, against the bare skin of her lower back.

“God, I’ve wanted to do that for a long time.” He whispers against her lips, the feeling of her breath against his cheek driving him crazy, and he wants to kiss her again, but he needs to know that she understands what this means for him, that this isn’t just because she looks irresistible in that damn dress.

“You should’ve done that a long time ago.” She whispers back, and she can see in his eyes that all of his walls are down, and he’s letting himself be real with her, he’s finally letting her see the feelings he has for her that were always buried beneath the surface.

“Felicity, this is-I mean that-what I’m trying to say, is that-fuck, I’m trying to say that I’m in love with you and that kiss meant everything to me and I need to know right now if you feel the same.” He rushes the last part, his forehead pressed against hers as she takes everything in, and it only takes her a few seconds before she’s pulling his lips back to hers, and sliding her hands underneath his jacket to rest her hands against his chest, so that she can feel his heart racing in his chest.

“I’ve been in love with you my whole life.” She finally says when they break apart, both breathing heavily, so content and wrapped up in the taste of each other that they didn’t notice the tide rising higher, and they’re both in water over their ankles, and Felicity giggles, because this is her dream, here with Oliver, and when he wraps his arm around her shoulders, and pulls her to his side so that they can watch the last moments of the sunset, wrapped up in each other, she feels like she has never been happier.

They stay that way until the sun has completely set, most of which they missed, too busy making up for lost time to fully appreciate the sunset. Felicity is wiping lipstick off of Oliver’s cheek when they make it back to the room, and Tommy yells, “Finally!” the second they walk into the door, and Laurel is squealing as she wraps Felicity in a hug. They end up in a dog pile on the floor, mindlessly watching Friends as they talk about their favorite parts of the vacation. Laurel and Tommy are on the couch, sprawled out but as close together as they possible can be, while Oliver and Felicity end up on the loveseat, Felicity draped across Oliver’s lap as she plays with his hair.

Everything feels different, but at the same time, it feels right. It feels like nothing has changed, because the pieces were so close to being into place anyway, that when they finally are in the right place, it feels like it’s how its been all along. Felicity can’t stop herself from pressing kisses to Oliver’s temple, and Oliver can’t keep his hands off of Felicity, whether it’s playing with a strand of her hair, or running his fingers up and down her arm. They fall into the same bed that night, Felicity curled under Oliver’s arm as they fall asleep, his arms holding her as close as possible, as before she falls asleep, he kisses her and tells her that he loves her, and it feels so right, and so perfect, that he feels like his heart might explode in his chest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! I know the end of this is kind of rushed, but I wanted to get this up sooner rather than later. The story is really going to start getting more intricate next chapter, with there probably being about 4 chapters left, after this one. I promise to give you all the Olicity you could every want coming up. 
> 
> Let me know what you guys think, and as always, you can find me on tumblr at ollie-and-licity.tumblr.com !


	7. Part Of Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lmfao I'M SORRY

“I can’t believe you leave tomorrow.” Felicity sighed as she rolled onto her stomach so she could face Oliver, her bare chest pressed against his side. He ran his fingers up and down her back, tracing patterns aimlessly, trying to commit the feeling of her to memory, uncertain now that he was faced with leaving her for endless weeks without any sort of contact. He had known it would be hard before, but he found that he had never slept better than when he was next to her, with her body pressed against his, her legs tangled with his. Felicity always laughed at him, because she said that Oliver was an octopus in his sleep, and it was true, because no matter how she shifted, or where she turned, Oliver would always wrap himself around her.

He leaned up to press a kiss to her shoulder, gently running his lips to her collar bone, her jaw, her cheek. She shivered, but bit her lip and stayed still, losing herself in the moment, in Oliver, because she knew that it was going to be over before she wanted it to be.

“We should head downstairs, Tommy and Laurel are going to be there soon.” They had all decided that they would spend their last night all together, in the living room of the Queen mansion, in a giant blanket fort. Thea and Sara had spent all day building the fort, baking snacks and cooking foods, preparing everything for the last night that they would all have together.

Felicity nodded, sitting up, flushing as Oliver’s eyes traced down her body. They were both guilty of being unable to keep their hands to themselves, or casting lingering glances that bordered on too long. They had finally figured everything out, and they couldn’t get enough of each other. Felicity gently shook her head, forcing herself to focus on getting up, and getting dressed before they went downstairs, but then Oliver was behind her, biting on her neck, sliding his hands over her, and she changed her mind, instead pulling him to the shower, a smile on both of their faces.

 

* * *

 

When they made it downstairs, Thea and Sara both squealed and pulled them into the fort, pushing them onto the pillow pile they had made for everyone to lean against, talking a million miles an hour about what they had made, and what movies they had picked, and Felicity’s heart clenched when she realized that Thea had picked all of Oliver and Tommy’s favorites. Oliver hid his face against Felicity’s neck, and anyone else might think that he just wanted to be close to her, because that’s how he was, but Felicity knew that it was because he was overwhelmed by how much his sister had done for him.

Tommy and Laurel came in soon after, piling onto the pillows next to Oliver and Felicity, and they spent the night watching their favorite movies. Thea threw popcorn everywhere while watching The Avengers (which Felicity knew for a fact she had put in there because she liked to stare at Chris Evans’ ass), Sara cried during The Princess Bride, and Oliver hid behind Felicity while watching The Woman in Black, even though he wouldn’t admit it.

Felicity stepped out sometime after midnight, overwhelmed with how upset she was getting at the thought that these were the last time their lives would be the same, because she had looked it up online, because she was Felicity and that’s what she did, and some of the Army wives had said that it’s better to hold your tears back until they’ve left, to make sure that they know that everything at home is going to be okay, because it helps keep them focused on the task at hand. She stood, silently looking at the stars, until she felt a presence next to her. She turned to see Tommy, leaning next to her, staring out at the dark night sky with her in a comfortable silence.

She curled herself against his side, resting her head on his shoulder as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders, both of  them absorbing the fact that they were going to be separated for the first time in their lives. It was almost impossible for Felicity to categorize everything that was running through her head. Everything in their lives was changing, and they were all leaving to start their own paths, their own lives, no longer with everyone right beside them.

“You know, sometimes I think about what it would be like if mom and dad were still around.” Tommy said, not taking his glance off of the stars in the sky, knowing that no matter what happened he could be reassured that Felicity would still be looking at the same sky.

“They would be so proud of you. You’re going to be a hero, Tommy. I can feel it.” Felicity whispered, biting her lip when it wobbled. She was so proud of Tommy, of Oliver, of everything she knew that they would accomplish. It was impossible not to be, because with the lifestyle they had grown up in, it was easy to become spoiled and lazy, to think that since they had money they would never have to work, but here they all were, doing more for the world, trying to make it a better place.

“It’s only going to be a couple weeks, Lyss.” Tommy told her, pressing a kiss to her temple as she sniffled, unable to keep a tear from rolling down her cheek. “I’ll be visiting you at MIT before you know it, and Oliver will come with and scare off all the boys that try to chase you down while he’s away.” Felicity chuckled through her tears, wiping at her face with the sleeve of her sweater. Tommy wiped away the remaining tears, before tugging her back to the living room, where they rejoined the dog pile on the floor.

Oliver immediately reached for Felicity, tucking her against his side and kissing her forehead, tangling his legs with hers so that they were completely tangled. Laurel was next to her, her fingers intertwined with Felicity’s as Tommy wrapped himself around Laurel. Thea placed her pillow on top of Oliver and Felicity’s legs, and sighed in content when Oliver reached down to play with her hair. Sara dropped in between Felicity and Laurel’s legs, wrapping a hand around Laurel’s ankle. They stayed like that until morning, and they all knew it would be the best sleep they got for weeks.

 

* * *

 

 

**Dear Oliver,**

**I’m officially all moved into MIT. It was crazy that you and Tommy weren’t there, and your mom cried buckets when they had to leave me. Then Thea and Sara started crying, so I was crying, and then Laurel burst into tears so of course it was a giant mess of tears everywhere. I still have tear stains all over my desk.**

**My room is what I would expect from a dorm room; way too goddamn small. You know me. I need space. I need room for my babies, and right now there is nowhere near enough room and it’s causing me PHYSICAL PAIN. My roommate is okay, I guess. We don’t really talk much because she’s always off with her boyfriend, and she’s an art major or something like that so we don’t really have much to talk about anyway. I kind of wish she didn’t spend so much time with her boyfriend because it makes me miss you more. I had to buy extra pillows to fill the space in my bed, not that there’s a lot, but it’s so hard to sleep without you right next to me.**

**How is everything? Are they whipping you into shape? Are you going to come home all buff and attractive as hell? Not that you aren’t already, but seriously, if you come back with massive muscles I’m going to need you to warn a girl, Oliver. There’s no point giving me a heart attack the first time we see each other after so long apart.**

**How’s Tommy? I know he’s going to say that everything is going okay because he doesn’t want to worry me but I expect you to be completely honest with me about him, and yourself, if you ever want to get laid ever again. Ever.**

**It’s almost time for me to go to class, which has actually been the highlight of my day. I’ve never met so many people who understand everything that I’m talking about, other than Barry. Who I did run into the other day, he says hi and that he’s happy you removed your head from your colon and finally got with me (his words, not mine). Cisco is here too, and Caitlin is really close by, studying to be a surgeon. It’s been nice to see them again, and it feels like old times.**

**My advisor thinks that since I was able to test out of so many classes, I should be able to graduate early. Crazy shit, huh? First they want me to come early, and now they think I can leave early. Moira is already talking to me about jobs I can get at Queen Consolidated, but I told her that it all depends on where you end up. I can get a job anywhere, all that matters is that I’m right next to you.**

**I love you, Oliver. I can’t wait to see you again.**

**Love always,**

**Your Felicity**

 

 

 

Dear Felicity,

I miss you so much it hurts. I think about you non-stop, and I can’t help but think of how you would react to some of the stuff we’ve been doing here. Sleeping without you is horrible. I think Tommy is having the same issue without Laurel there next to him. We both toss and turn most nights, which doesn’t really help when we’re up at the literal ass crack of dawn to go run with full gear, but it’s all going to be worth it. We’re both doing just fine, Felicity. I swear. But your brother read that part of the letter over my shoulder and he might be permanently scarred. He might be permanently scarred anyway, because his favorite thing is pissing off our superior, and it gets me in trouble because I laugh every time.

I can’t really tell you much of what’s going on or where I am, but just know that I’m okay, and I’m thinking about you, and I’m counting down the days until I see you again.

Tell Barry that I say hi, and that he’s 100% justified for the colon comment. It’s true. It took me way longer than it should have. I’m pretty embarrassed about it actually. I’m glad that you have Caitlin and Cisco with you too, I hope it makes you feel a little bit closer to home.

I don’t have a lot of time, and I know that this letter is pretty pathetic but I don’t even know how to put into words how much I miss you.

Just know that you’re my girl, Angel. Now and always.

I love you.

Oliver

P.S. My only goal now is to get so buff that your face goes that adorable shade of red it gets when you’re really embarrassed or really sexually frustrated.

 

 

_Dear Felicity,_

_I’m going to start this letter by saying that I can’t believe you made me read something like that with my own two eyes. Really? I do not need to know about your sex life with Oliver. Ever. And I know your argument will be that it was Oliver’s letter, and I shouldn’t be reading his things, and my response to that is that I am nosy and there is no cure for it and you should predict my actions._

_We really are both okay, though. I know that Oliver already told you, but I figured that I would reassure you again. Everything is fine. We’re both getting our asses busted into shape and I have a newfound respect for people who exercise willingly, and I should have taken your Steve Rogers pre-serum comment more seriously because I thought I was going to die during the first two weeks. Literally, just die._

_The guys here are pretty cool. There’s a guy, Roy, that Oliver didn’t get along with for the longest time and now they’re best buddies. You should know that they didn’t get along because Roy overheard us talking about you and Roy casually said “I’d do her.” because he’s a punk, and then Oliver punched him in the face and we all had to run an extra mile with the packs, and then everyone hated each other, and now they’re like best friends. Does it make sense? Absolutely not. I don’t get it. But, I already made Oliver promise not to replace me, so it’s all fine._

_Our superior, John Diggle, is the coolest person on the face of the EARTH. I call him dad, and he gets super pissed at me and makes me do extra push-ups but it’s worth it to see him endearingly sigh and shake his head every time I do it._

_I miss you like hell, Lyss. You and Laurel. I can’t wait to see you guys. Feels like it can’t come soon enough._

_I love you._

_Tommy_

 

**Dear Tommy,**

**If you keep reading Oliver’s letters I’m going to graphically describe every detail of our sex lives because it’s for your own good that you stop being so nosy. It’s also probably for your own good that you stop calling your superior dad, but to be honest I think it’s hysterical.**

**Oliver hasn’t mentioned any Roy’s, so I think your spot as best friend is still safe. Although, it really doesn’t surprise me that Oliver hauled off and punched someone. It was only a matter of time. I’m weirdly proud of it. But don’t tell him that, he’ll get a huge ego.**

**I’m sorry that I haven’t been keeping in better touch. I’m taking the maximum credits right now, and it seems like I never have enough time to get everything done how I want it to be done. I’ve already gotten in trouble for hacking into the school system and fixing some glaringly obvious security risks. No appreciation.**

**I saw Laurel the other day, and she looks happy. She’s top of her class, of course, and I’ve already been hearing rumors that she’s got some big firms looking at getting her as an employee. She’s going to be the one that has to keep me out of jail when I inevitably hack something that I shouldn’t. Oops.**

**There’s going to be a huge career fair in two weeks, so I’m hoping to give my application to everyone and start finding options for when you guys come home.**

**It feels like time is dragging, but going so fast. There’s only a couple weeks left before you guys come home. I can’t wait.**

**I love you. Be careful.**

**Felicity**

 

Oliver had noticed that the closer it came to basic being over, the more antsy he got. The weeks had flown by, blending into each other in a blur of action and training, learning and doing and getting prepared for deployment. Neither of them had told Felicity, but they were already set to deploy two weeks after they finished basic training. They both knew that it would just stress her out, and with the career fair being so close, they wanted her focus on that. It was hard only being able to interact through letters, because there were so many things they couldn’t say, or didn’t have to time to write, and he knew that when they all got together again they would have so many stories to share amongst each other. Oliver had heard from his mother, Thea, Sara, Laurel, and even his dad had written a letter. It wasn’t long, and it almost entirely consisted just of him saying that he was proud of Oliver, and he wouldn’t even deny that it had made him cry.

Oliver was in the middle of penning a response to Felicity’s last letter, filled with nothing other than computer jargon and laments about how much she missed him, when he started feeling like something was wrong. He couldn’t place it, and he had no idea how to even describe it, but he felt like there was something missing.

He shrugged it off, going back to writing his letter, grinning as he wrote about all the different things he was going to do with Felicity when he got home, when his drill sergeant, John Diggle, came into the tent, the rest of the members of Oliver’s basic training squad in tow.

“Listen up, all of you. There’s been some new developments. You’re deploying immediately.”

Oliver and Tommy glanced at each other in horror, and Oliver felt his chest clench when he thought of how Felicity would react to that news. They had meant to tell her together, in person, where they could sandwich her in between them and hold her until she calmed down. She needed support, she couldn’t be expected to get the news in a letter and not be a mess.

“Your families will be notified accordingly, and once you deploy, you’ll be able to get in contact with them again over the phone, or online. Pack nothing. Head to the chow hall to grab something to eat, and get a good night’s rest because tomorrow you’re traveling to Afghanistan.” Everyone shuffled accordingly, some mumbling quietly to friends, others excitedly wondering where they would be, and what they would be doing. Tommy and Oliver both stood to leave, when Diggle stopped them, directing them back to their cots. “You two…you’re not deploying just yet. You have two weeks compassionate leave.”

The horrible feeling had come back full force in Oliver’s chest, and he couldn’t speak around the lump that had formed in this throat. Compassionate leave meant something had happened, someone had died, and they were being given leave to bury their family member.

“Why?” Tommy asked, voice shaking as he laced his fingers together, focusing so hard on that one task that it wouldn’t let him feel anything else, and Oliver would remember Diggle’s next words for the rest of his life.

“The development-it was- it is- there was a bombing at MIT. Felicity is in critical condition.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I don't know how many of you come from a military family, like I do, but a lot of the stuff that I've put in here is really stretching the truth on what could actually happen and it's not all 100% accurate and I just want to say that it isn't because I'm ignorant, it's all for the sake of the story.
> 
> Also, I know that this chapter is kind of rushed, and I'm sooooo sorry about that but I could't think of a good way to describe the entire time they're in basic and I wanted to make sure that I at least got a chapter out because it's been a while. After this, there are about 3 chapters left. I hope you guys will stay with me <3


	8. Just A Dream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SORRY

Oliver barely remembered the trip back to Starling, or the three days since that he had spent in a chair next to Felicity’s bed. His days bled into one another, and he only knew that it had been 24 hours when his mother or Thea showed up to force him to eat and shower. Laurel, who had beaten them home, composed herself long enough each day to convince Tommy to eat and shower before she retreated to Felicity’s side with red-rimmed eyes and tears on her cheeks. No one spoke, instead sitting in silence, staring at the monitors on the wall to track her every heartbeat. Their only consolation was that she was able to breathe on her own, which marked an improvement from when she had been brought in.

The bombing, considered one of the worst attacks of terrorism they had ever faced, had leveled most of the center of MIT’s campus, killing over 200 people and injuring hundreds more. It was the only thing talked about on the news, but it made Oliver sick to see the destruction so they had turned it off days ago. Barry, who had been on campus as well, survived with his worst injury being a broken leg. He stopped in every day, with Caitlin, and Cisco in tow, to crowd around Tommy, Oliver and Laurel to provide them with any comfort they could.

Felicity, who had been closer to the blast, suffered from four broken ribs, severe head trauma, and a multitude of internal injuries. With how close she had been, the doctors were surprised that she hadn’t sustained more injuries.

“I can’t do this anymore.” Tommy whispered, hauling himself out of his chair and pushing out of the room on unsteady legs. Laurel flinched when the door swung shut, tears slipping down her cheeks again. Oliver reached across the bed gently resting a hand on Laurel’s knee, trying to pull his focus from Felicity to comfort his grieving friend, but his eyes were pulled back to Felicity when he thought he saw a flash of her blue eyes.

“I’ll go after him.” She said finally, pressing a kiss to Oliver’s cheek as she left. Oliver let out a shuddering sigh, dropping his head onto Felicity’s bed, letting himself break down. He couldn’t stand seeing her this way; her hair was in loose, strung out curls from when the nurses had bathed her, cuts and bruises covering almost all of her visible skin. Felicity was the most energetic, happy, outgoing person he had ever met and it pained him more than anything else to see her silent and injured.

“God, Felicity, please don’t leave me.” He whispered, his voice cracking on her name as tears streamed down his face, mind wandering to the last time he had been able to think about their life together without seeing an emptiness of uncertainty. He knew already that Felicity was the girl that he wanted to marry, he felt like he had known his entire life that the only girl for him was the babbling blonde that had spent her entire life supporting him and patching him up after fights, after breakups, after anything. She was always there for him, and the one time that she had needed him, he hadn’t been there. “I’m sorry, Felicity, I love you, I should have been here with you, I’m so fucking sorry, please don’t leave me.”

“Oliver…” he froze, because it didn’t matter that it had been barely a whisper, or that it was hoarse beyond belief, he knew that voice. He had heard that voice say his name in every possible way, so much so that he was starting to think it was her favorite word, and when he felt a hand in his hair he shuddered, squeezing his eyes shut before he sat up, blue locking on blue as Felicity slid her hand along the stubble on Oliver’s cheek, wiping at the tears that slid down it.

“Felicity.” She smiled gently at him, sighing in relief when he shot forward, burying his face in her neck as he sobbed, one hand in her hair and the other holding himself up, away from her ribs so he wouldn’t hurt her. She pressed a kiss to his temple, eyes filling with tears when he sat back and she could get a good look at him. She could tell that he had gotten taller, and she could see the outlines of his muscles through his shirt, but he looked exhausted. He had bags under his eyes, and his face was pale, lined with tear tracks that she knew had been there for a while.

“I’m okay.” She whispered, closing her eyes as Oliver rested his forehead against hers, breathing him in like she hadn’t in weeks, resting her other hand against his neck when he tilted his head to capture her lips, whimpering at the contact, because he hadn’t let himself believe he would feel it again because he wouldn’t be able to handle it if she had taken a turn for the worse while he assumed she would be fine, and she pulled him closer, as weak as she was, because in her fits of drugged wakefulness she had heard the doctors, and her friends and family talk about what had happened, and she knew she was lucky to have survived, that she was lucky to be here, with Oliver’s lips pressed against her own, like she was water and he had been in a desert for too long.

“Marry me.” He sighed, pushing Felicity’s hair out of her face so he could see her face, which was full of surprise, and her eyes were welling up and Oliver started to wonder if it was too much too soon but then she was sobbing a ‘yes’ into his shoulder as she wrapped her arms around him, ignoring the burning in her ribs because this was all she had wanted.

There was a quiet knock at the door and they unwillingly separated, letting the nurse in to check Felicity’s vitals and ask questions about how she felt, and Oliver never let go of her hand, playing with her fingers, paying special attention to her ring finger, where he would put the ring he had bought before they went to basic, because she had seen it online and squealed about it with Thea for hours and he knew then that it was the only ring he would want to see on her finger, and Felicity couldn’t keep a smile off of her face, even as the nurse warned her about her long recovery ahead.

Tommy and Laurel came back together, and while Laurel launched herself into Felicity’s arms, Tommy dropped to the floor, face in his hands as he fought to pull himself together, and Felicity burst into tears as she watched her brother, and soon everyone was crying in a pile on Felicity’s bed, everyone clinging to each other for the first time since they’d all gone their separate ways.

They eventually managed to separate so that Oliver and Laurel could go call their families and let them know that Felicity was okay, and soon enough Felicity’s room was full of everyone she loved, and Barry was sat in the bed next to her as they hugged each other, both of them appreciating how lucky they were, and Thea and Sara were hugging each other and crying, each perched on either side of Felicity’s feet. Oliver held Felicity’s left hand, still playing with her ring finger, and Moira wore a knowing smile on her face as she watched her son, knowing what he had done. Tommy and Laurel clung to each other, sitting in a chair on Felicity’s other side, whispering back and forth about what would happen next, in the future, and Tommy smiled at his sister, who looked exhausted but blissfully happy, and he knew that they would all be okay.

 

* * *

 

 

Everyone’s blissful happiness was short lived. Tommy and Oliver had received orders that they had until the end of the week to wrap up any loose ends before they were set to deploy. Felicity had been released earlier that day, and was setting up camp in the Queen living room when Oliver and Tommy came to find her. She knew immediately that something was wrong, because the light in Oliver’s eyes that had been there since he’d proposed had gone out. They hadn’t told anyone, because she didn’t want it dampened by her continued stay in the hospital, but the ring was on a chain around her neck, tucked into her sweatshirt.

“What is it?” She asked, nerves increasing when Oliver didn’t sit next to her, instead choosing to pace back and forth while Tommy took her hand and told her as quickly and gently as he could that they were set to deploy. She looked to Oliver for confirmation, and the look on his face when they made eye contact told her everything she needed to know. Felicity swallowed, forcing herself to not cry as she nodded, launching into a babble about how they needed to make sure that all of their things were put together and settled before they left. Oliver and Tommy both knew that she was barely holding on, but who were they to take away Felicity’s bravado, so Oliver sat on Felicity’s other side as she picked out a mindless TV show, and the three of them sat in silence, each too lost in their own thoughts to hold any conversation.

 

* * *

 

 

“I feel like we just did this whole ‘last night together’ bullshit.” Felicity grumbled, gingerly lowering herself into bed. Oliver rolled himself on top of her, holding all of his weight on his elbows as he pressed kisses to her shoulder and neck, following the silver chain to her engagement ring, where it rested in between her breasts.

“Last time you weren’t the future Mrs. Queen.” He said as he gently bit to the left of the ring, drawing a strained gasp out of Felicity’s throat. She dug her nails into Oliver’s shoulder as he moved further down, inching her tank top out of his way, unable to hide his grin as Felicity’s breathing got louder until she pulled him back up to her mouth, locking her legs around his hips, grabbing at Oliver until he gave in and rolled his hips against hers, gasping at the contact.

“Don’t you dare baby me, Oliver.” Felicity threatened, and Oliver had to laugh, because gimpy Felicity, who had whined earlier because Oliver had poked her in the side, was barking orders about how she wanted him to fuck her.

“God, I love you.” Oliver told her as he pulled her shirt over her head, gently maneuvering it over her ribs as she bit back her pained gasp, refusing to let on how much her ribs bothered her, because she would be damned if she let Oliver deploy before she got to sleep with him again.

“I love you, too.” She whispered, sliding her hands into Oliver’s hair as they slowly shed each other of the last of their clothes. It wasn’t the first time they’d been together, by any means, but it felt like something was changing between them. They were both young, barely even adults but they both knew that they were it for each other. He knew Felicity, and he knew that she already had their lives together planned out and instead of scaring him, that thought was what got him through every day. Things changed, people came in and out of lives, moved away or moved in, but nothing in this world could change his life with Felicity.

Felicity was doing her best with keeping herself together, and she prided herself on only having cried a handful of times in the peace and quiet of her bathroom, unbeknown to Oliver. She didn’t want him to worry about her, or her feelings, while he was deployed. She only wanted her fiancé and her brother to come back to her in one piece. She could feel the ring pressed up between her chest and Oliver’s as he worshipped her neck, his hands wringing gasps out of her with ease, because Oliver knew exactly how to take Felicity apart and put her back together. She had known from the beginning that their relationship wouldn’t be easy; military relationships were bound to be hard, and she hadn’t ever had a choice when it came to Oliver, but she had never imagined that it would feel like a piece of her heart would be ripped out of her chest when he left. She kept up a stream of whispers about how much she loved him, and sometimes she couldn’t string a sentence together and just devolved into gasping his name into his ear, but it was the most amazing thing Oliver had ever heard.

They both fell apart together, Felicity’s teeth latched onto Oliver’s collar bone as she clutched to him as tightly as she could, relishing in the feel of his body weight on top of hers. It was a few minutes before their breathing returned to normal, and Felicity chided herself as her eyes started welling up with tears, her throat burning as she tried to hold them in. Oliver knew Felicity better than she knew herself, and he knew exactly what her tells were when she was upset. He knew that she had been trying to hide her distress over their deployment, and he had let her because he knew that she would be even more upset if she knew that she wasn’t as good of an actress as she thought she was, but it was their last night together and he didn’t want her to keep anything from him.

“It’s okay, Angel.” He whispered, kissing her forehead and shifting so that they were laying sideways, Felicity’s body cocooned by his. She took shallow breaths, trying to keep herself together, trying to keep the breakdown at bay until tomorrow, after they left, but Oliver was clutching her tighter, and whispering reassurances in her ear, and she couldn’t stop the tears from escaping as she buried her face in his neck, sobbing that she couldn’t lose him or her brother. Oliver let her cry, gently running his hands up and down her back as he told her all about the training they had gotten in basic, and how ready and prepared they were for whatever was thrown at them overseas. He told her about how he and Tommy always had each other’s backs, like they had since they were little kids, and nothing could change that because they were brothers, even if not technically, and Felicity’s tears slowly subsided into tired whimpers, her grip on Oliver never loosening, even as she let him lull her to sleep with reassurances that they would both come back to her, together, because where one went the other was always going to follow, and if Oliver stayed up late, to reassure himself as much as he needed to reassure Felicity, he was the only one who knew.

 

* * *

 

 

“Three months down.” Felicity said gently, running her fingers across the screen, wishing that she could reach through to run her hand along Oliver’s cheek. He smiled at her, and it fluttered her heart, even if he was thousands of miles away from her with a crappy video feed. Tommy pretended to vomit from behind Oliver, and Felicity couldn’t stop herself from laughing. Felicity had broken down to Tommy the next morning, after her night with Oliver, clinging to him and sobbing as he cried into her hair, horrified at the thought of leaving his injured sister and flying to another continent. Tommy had always been around to protect Felicity, and he hadn’t been there for her when the bombing had happened, and it had been hard for him to understand. His sister and his friends made up the family that they had amassed after their parents died, and he knew that they were beyond lucky, but the bond that Tommy had with Felicity was the most important thing to him. Tommy went to Felicity for everything, even before Laurel, and Felicity did the same. It didn’t matter what changed in their relationships, nothing changed how they were together.

Felicity and Oliver still hadn’t told anyone about their engagement. With the deployment happening so soon, neither of them had felt much like celebrating the news of their upcoming marriage with such a large cloud hanging over their heads. Felicity knew it was hard on Oliver to keep such a large secret from his best friend, and for her it was a horrible nagging feeling to keep something from her brother, but she wanted to be able to tell Tommy in person.

Felicity, who was still recovering at home, was given the semester off by MIT but had told them that she would finish all of her classes online. Being back in the Queen mansion with Thea, and Moira, and practically Sara made her feel better about Oliver and Tommy being gone. She worried every day, and she couldn’t bring herself to ever watch the news, but with the overwhelming support she was getting from her family, she found that she was mostly okay. Laurel, who was succeeding outrageously at Harvard, came home often to be with Felicity, and the two of them spent most of their time reminiscing about their friendship, and how much their lives had changed over the past few years.

“We gotta head out for a perimeter check, but I’ll talk to you when I can. I love you.” Oliver told her, bringing her focus back to her laptop. Oliver leaned forward to kiss the webcam, staying long enough to hear Felicity’s response of love and safe wishes, before he left to leave the two siblings alone.

“Be careful, Tommy.” She told him, doing her best to plaster a smile on her face. Tommy saluted her, a grin across his features as he responded, “I always am, Lyss. Love you.”

“Love you.” She said, watching as Tommy closed the laptop. She closed her own laptop, sighing heavily as she curled in on herself on the couch, sending up a prayer to whatever gods there were that they came home safe.

 

* * *

 

 

“I don’t know, man, I have a weird feeling about this.” Oliver said, watching as Tommy climbed into the third Humvee in the convoy. They were set to do a perimeter check around the Forward Operating Base, just to ensure that their borders were secure, but Oliver had a nagging feeling that something wasn’t right. After the feeling he had right before Diggle had told them about the MIT bombing, Oliver was on edge. Tommy clapped Oliver on the shoulder, settling himself into the Humvee and strapping himself in.

“It’s gonna be fine, Ollie, you just have heartburn because you miss my sister.” Oliver rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest.

“You don’t get heartburn because you miss someone, Tommy.” Tommy waved him off as Oliver climbed into the second Humvee, doing his best to ignore the tight feeling in his chest. He pulled a picture out of his pocket, a picture of the four of them the summer that Oliver had finally gotten his head out of his ass. Felicity was sprawled across the three of them, her head resting on Oliver’s shoulder, laughing. Laurel had her arms wrapped around Felicity’s middle, smiling at the camera as Tommy kissed her cheek, his arms holding Felicity’s legs. Oliver was staring down at Felicity like she hung the moon in the sky, and it was such a genuine picture that it calmed him down every time. They had all gotten through so much; they could get through anything as long as it was together.

The convoy set out once everyone was settled, and for a while it was just the hum of the engines and the banter of the platoon, shooting the breeze as they kept an eye out for anything weird. Harper, who had been assigned to the same Humvee, had started making comments about Thea, and before Oliver could respond there was an explosion from behind them. The blast knocked them off course, sending them sideways before the driver could stop them. Oliver scrambled from the Humvee, loading his gun and dropping into a crouch, trying to gather his bearings before he ran to the third Humvee. It was engulfed in flames, and he could see Tommy laying on the ground a few feet away from it, so without thinking he rushed forward, the rest of the convoy flanking him. Oliver dropped next to Tommy, stomach rioting when he saw the shrapnel in his chest. Tommy coughed weakly, and Oliver placed his hands over the wounds, trying his best to stop the bleeding.

“Hey, it’s fine, everything’s fine. I need a medic!” Oliver called the last part over his shoulder, trying to ignore the wet, sucking noises coming from Tommy’s chest. Oliver knew that shrapnel had to have hit Tommy’s lungs, and he knew that it was only a matter of time before he bled out. They would never make it back to camp in time.

“O-Ollie-“

“I’m here, buddy. You’re gonna be fine, okay, we just gotta get you back to base.” Oliver said, wiping at the blood trickling out of Tommy’s mouth, only succeeding in smearing it across his cheek, his hands shaking of their own accord.

“You…have to…Felicity…” Oliver couldn’t hold back the sob that ripped out of his throat as he shook his head, keeping his hands pressed on Tommy’s chest, the rest of the world fading out as he watched his best friend.

“You have to hold on, Tommy, she’s gonna need someone to walk her down the aisle. I’m marrying her, Tommy. I asked her and she said yes and she can’t do it without you.” Oliver could see the flash of understanding in Tommy’s eyes, and the slightest quirk of his lips told Oliver that he was trying to smile.

“Take…care…her.” Oliver shook his head again, tears racing down his cheeks as he forced himself to breathe, his chest burning like he had been hit himself. Tommy’s eyes slowly fluttered shut and Oliver yelled, bent over Tommy’s body as he cried, gripping Tommy’s shoulders.

“Open your eyes, Tommy! Open your eyes!” his voice was raw in his throat as he shook Tommy, fingers clutching at his torn uniform. Any second Tommy would open his eyes and they’d get back to base and he would get surgery and an award for being injured and they would go home, and Tommy would walk Felicity down the aisle to him, like they had planned.

“Come on, Queen, you gotta let go. We need to get him and the others back to camp.” Diggle’s voice was rough and emotional in his ear, his hands struggling to pull the still bent over Oliver off of Tommy.

“No! No he has to wake up first, he has to wake up I need him-“ Without realizing it, the platoon had assembled around Oliver and Tommy, the rest of the Humvee casualties already loaded into the remaining working Humvees. Harper came to crouch on the other side of Tommy, pushing his hands underneath Tommy’s shoulder and legs, waiting for Oliver to do the same.

“Come on, man, help me pick him up. We need to get him home.” Oliver froze, turning away from Tommy to throw up in the sand, his stomach heaving until there was nothing left. Diggle stayed behind him, and when he was ready, Diggle turned Oliver back to Tommy and helped him lift. They loaded Oliver and Tommy into the back of the Humvee, where Oliver clung onto Tommy until they made it back to base.

The base medics tried to get him to let Tommy go, but a quick command from Diggle had them allowing Oliver into the medical tent. Oliver clung to Tommy’s hand as the medics officially pronounced him dead, before they covered him with a blanket.

Diggle found Oliver there hours later, still clutching to Tommy’s hands. Diggle told him that they would both be sent home so that they could prepare for the funeral. Felicity was being notified as they spoke, and they would be on a plane home in the hour.

Oliver didn’t speak the entire way home.

 

* * *

 

 

“Ms. Merlyn, the Secretary of the Army has asked me to express his deep regret that your brother, Thomas Merlyn, was killed in action in Afghanistan last night. The Secretary extends his deepest sympathy to you and your family in your tragic loss.”

The words played over and over again in her head as they drove to the airport, where Oliver would be arriving with Tommy’s body. It had been two days since the officers had shown up at her door, hats in hand, to inform her that her brother, her only living family, was dead. It had been two days since she’d last spoken, since she’d last been able to eat anything without throwing up. It had been two days since she’d last been able to look at Laurel, because every time she did she was forced to see the broken shell of a woman who had lost the love of her life at 18. It had been two days since she had been able to look at herself in the mirror, because each time she did she saw the ghost of her brother standing over her shoulder.

Thea helped Felicity out of the car, holding her up with an arm around her waist. They were joined by Sara, Laurel and Moira, all clinging to each other as the plane door was opened and Oliver stepped out, his shoulder holding up the right front end of a casket, the American flag draped over it. Diggle was on the opposite side of the casket, with other members of the group behind them. They marched forward, towards the group, everyone fighting to maintain composure. When they were within a few feet of them, Felicity lurched forward, collapsing against Oliver with a sob. One of her hands gripped the casket, the other clutched at Oliver’s uniform as she fought to accept that the last she would see of her brother was a casket.

Laurel came up next to them, a shaking hand resting on the top of the casket, and Felicity looked away as she cried, hiding her face in Oliver’s shoulder. Oliver held Felicity up with one arm his face buried in her hair as he let himself break down. Diggle quietly ordered them to move the casket to the hearse, where it would be taken to the funeral home until tomorrow’s funeral. Felicity stuck to Oliver’s side, and Felicity managed to grab onto Laurel’s hand, clutching to the other girl as they watched Tommy’s body lowered into the car.

Oliver came back to Felicity and Laurel, pulling both of them into a hug as they cried, clinging to each other to try and fix part of the hole in their lives.

 

* * *

 

 

Each shot that rang out felt like it was lodging itself in her heart. Her hand was clutching Oliver’s so hard that her knuckles were white, and Laurel was hunched over the folded flag in her lap that Felicity had handed to her, unable to look at it. Diggle had made sure to organize a proper military funeral, even though Tommy was being buried on the Queen property.

Felicity, who hadn’t been able to stop crying, found that she ran out of tears somewhere in the middle of the ceremony, and instead she just felt numb, unable to process or understand. She had buried her parents, what seemed like only yesterday, and today she had to watch as the last member of her family was laid to rest.

Afterwards, Moira led Laurel away, and Thea and Sara followed, leaving Felicity and Oliver at the grave site, silently standing next to each other.

“I’m sorry, Felicity. It should’ve been me. He was your brother, your family, and fuck, you would’ve found someone better if it was me that went…it should’ve been me-”

“I’m pregnant, Oliver.” Felicity responded, quietly, not tearing her gaze away from Tommy’s headstone. She had found out a few weeks ago, but hadn’t told anyone, just like with the engagement, because she wanted to tell Oliver in person.

“P-pregnant?”

“Yeah. I found out a couple weeks ago, but I wanted to tell you in person. Just like we wanted to tell Tommy.” Her voice was flat, and it wavered slightly over Tommy’s name, her eyes locking with Oliver’s as she watched him take in what she had said.

“I told him.” Oliver whispered, almost regretting it when Felicity’s face crumbled, tears spilling down her cheeks again. “I told him before…before he died. I was trying to get him to hold on.” Oliver’s voice wobbled as he cried, reaching for Felicity when her legs gave out, and she cried against his chest. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t leave me.” Felicity whimpered, clinging to Oliver like she was worried he would disappear if he let go. Oliver looked up, regret washing over him as he thought about what he had said, and how stupid it had been. Felicity was the last of her family, and as much as he was struggling with the guilt of surviving, Felicity was struggling with the thought that she could lose Oliver too.

“I couldn’t do that.” He told her, sinking to the ground with her so they could both grieve for Tommy, wrapped up in each other. “I’m so sorry.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i'm so sorry. I am. I love you all.
> 
> There's one more chapter left, guys! Thanks for staying with me.


	9. History

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is it guys!

The first thing he notices is that he can smell blood, and when he looks down, it’s covering his hands, and his forearms, drenching his uniform. He can hear a wet, shallow noise that sounds like someone is having the life sucked out of them, and when he looks around he sees that it’s Tommy, on the ground, bleeding out. There’s a gaping hole in his chest and Oliver can feel his stomach rioting in his body, and he can feel the rising sense of panic taking over him; he can see Tommy but he can’t move and there’s nothing he can do, he just has to watch Tommy slowly die as he calls out for help, as he calls out for his sister.

Oliver startled awake, sitting bolt upright and gasping for air. He launched himself towards the bathroom, bending over the toilet as his stomach rid itself of all of its contents, and afterwards he dropped to his knees, wiping at his mouth with shaking hands. He glanced at the bedroom, relieved that he didn’t see Felicity. He had been doing his best to hide the extent of his nightmares from her, scared that it would send her over the edge. He had been walking on eggshells around her, dedicating his time to making sure that she was healthy. Finding out that she was pregnant had changed everything for them. They’d told everyone the same time that they told them about the engagement, and it had been a shining moment in a sea of darkness. Everyone had cried, gathered in the living room of the Queen mansion, huddled together as they tried to ward off the sinking feeling they had every time they looked around for Tommy and found he wasn’t there.

Laurel had left the day after their announcement to head back to Harvard. Felicity had tried to stop her, to tell her that they still needed more time, but Laurel had disagreed. She had left, wanting to put as many miles between her and Starling city as she could.

He stood slowly, rinsing his mouth with mouthwash before he stepped out of his bedroom, patting barefoot through the house until he found Felicity, wrapped in a blanket with a cup of tea, watching a TV show about wedding dresses. They hadn’t talked very much about the wedding, but now that Felicity was wearing the ring on her finger, he couldn’t look at her without thinking about it. It sent him over the moon to think about that fact that she would be Felicity Queen, hopefully sooner rather than later, but his thoughts were always clouded by the loss of Tommy. He had always thought that Tommy would be the one to walk Felicity down the aisle, wearing a stupidly large grin on his face as he gave his sister away to his best friend.

“Couldn’t sleep either?” She asked him, holding her blanket open as he crawled onto the couch next to her, resting his head against her chest as she wrapped him up, setting her cup on the table in front of them. He rested a hand on her stomach, tracing over the smooth expanse of it with a small smile. She had the tiniest bump that more resembled her stomach after she’d gone on an ice cream bender, but he knew that their child was in there, growing stronger every day. She threaded her fingers with his, their conjoined hands resting on her stomach as they both sat lost in their thoughts.

“Do you want a boy or a girl?” He asked her, glancing up at her from where his head was still resting against her chest. Her other hand was gently carding through his hair, fingernails scratching at his scalp. Oliver could feel the memory of his nightmare slowly drifting away as he lost himself in Felicity and the smell of her, and the feeling of her body wrapped around his. She chased away his demons just by being next to him.

“I don’t know,” she said, shifting slightly so they could both lay down. She could tell that Oliver was exhausted, and she knew that he’d been having nightmares. More than once she’d woken up to him whimpering Tommy’s name, and each time she had given herself a moment to break down, to cry herself out, before she would curl up against Oliver’s side, stroking his hair until he forgot his nightmare.

“I think I want a boy. I mean, I’m going to love either, but I feel like I’ll be a little less stressed if it’s a boy. Because if it’s a girl she’s never going to be able to date.” Felicity giggled, pressing a kiss to his forehead as she shifted closer, burying her face against the top of his head.

“If it’s a boy I hope he looks like you. With my smarts, though. Wouldn’t want him to be as ‘dumb jock’ as his father.” Oliver gaped in protest, rolling onto Felicity as he tickled her sides until she shrieked with laughter, the beautiful tinkling filling up the living room. It was the first time he’d heard her laugh like that in months; the sound of it made his heart contract, his smile fading slightly as he pressed his lips against hers, holding himself above her as she wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him back. He ran his hands down her side, moving her sweatshirt up so he could kiss along her stomach, biting along the waistband of her sweatpants as she gasped, fisting her hands in his hair. It had been hard the first few days that he was home with the funeral and Laurel leaving, neither of them had felt much like getting each other off, but Felicity found that when she and Oliver were wrapped up in each other, it made her forget everything else. She had never thought that she would be one to use sex as a coping mechanism, and she partly blamed it on her hormones being all over the place, but she craved Oliver.

“Oh?” he asked her, grinning up at her with a devilish grin as he pulled her sweatpants down her legs, biting along the exposed flesh as she whimpered, hands fisting in the blanket when Oliver moved out of her reach. She realized she must have spoken out loud, about her craving for Oliver, and when he pulled her underwear off with his teeth, she was thankful for her mindless babbling.

He made her come twice with his fingers before he even entered her, biting her neck as she raked her nails down his back. He hissed against her neck, moving a hand down to her clit, determined to make her come a third time before he did, which he succeeded at. He collapsed half of top of her, the sweat drying on both of their bodies as he kept kissing her neck, wrapping her up in his arms as she dozed lightly, fingers running up and down his forearm with a lazy contentment.

“I love you.” He whispered in her ear, teeth gently latching onto her earlobe as she hummed, shifting herself closer to him.

“I love you more.”

Oliver let Felicity doze as he stood up, pulling his sweatpants on before he grabbed a glass of water, standing in the kitchen as he remembered all of the times that he and Tommy had gotten in trouble in that very room. He let himself be lost in his memories for a moment, a small smile still on his face as he went back into the living room. He gently woke Felicity up, helping her back into her sweatpants before he carried her up to their bedroom, dropping her onto the bed as she let out a small giggle. She tangled all of her limbs with Oliver’s, nuzzling her face into his neck as he kissed her hair, pulling the comforter over their bodies.

“Oliver?” Felicity mumbled, already on her way to being back asleep, but she knew she wouldn’t be able to sleep unless she told him what she’d been thinking.

“Yeah?” He asked, shifting slightly to glance down at her, eyes already closed in exhaustion.

“I know that you have nightmares about Tommy. And I just want you to know that you can talk to me about them, or anything else. He was your brother as much as he was mine. You don’t have to hide things from me because you’re worried it’s going to upset me. We’re in this together, just like everything else.” Oliver nodded, hugging Felicity closer to himself as he tried to keep his tears at bay. She was right, he had worried about sharing his nightmares because he hadn’t wanted to burden her any more than she already was. She had been through enough, she didn’t need his emotional baggage dragging her down either. He realized now how stupid he had been. He had underestimated Felicity, something he felt like he had been doing his whole life, and as she fell back asleep, he told her over and over again how much he loved her, feeling for the first time like they might be able to make it through this.

 

* * *

 

 

“Felicity! Stop fidgeting.” Thea said, grabbing her hips and forcing her to stand still as she attached the veil to the diamond encrusted tiara. Felicity stayed completely still, terrified that Thea was going to kill her if she moved, but she couldn’t help that she was nervous. She didn’t really understand why she was, because this was what she had always wanted; to marry Oliver, the love of her life. They had agreed that they would let Moira plan something small, and, thankfully, that had been followed. It was going to be Moira, Robert and Thea, Sara, Barry, Caitlin and Cisco. Laurel, who hadn’t returned to Starling since Tommy’s funeral, didn’t think that she would be able to handle coming back to the Queen Mansion. Felicity understood Laurel’s hesitations, and she didn’t blame her friend at all.

Moira had put the wedding together in a matter of a week, and had found Felicity the most beautiful dress. It was simple; flowy and light, with a completely open back. It hid the small baby bump that she had, growing slightly every week. She knew that soon she would start showing noticeably, and she found that the prospect excited her. She looked down at her stomach with a smile, missing the photo that Sara took of her with watery eyes. Since the weather was turning colder, Moira had ordered that the ball room be transformed. Felicity knew that there were Christmas lights decorating every inch of the massive room, candles lighting up the room with a simple glow. Moira had ordered white lilies, knowing that they were Felicity’s favorite, but had given Felicity a bouquet of pearls. It was something that Moira had seen online, in her searching, and Felicity found that it was one of her favorite things about the wedding.

The wedding was going to be, mainly, informal but she knew that there was still going to be a small aisle for her to walk down. She had decided to walk alone, since Tommy was supposed to have been the one to walk her. The thought brought tears to her eyes, and she fanned herself, determined to not ruin the hours Thea had spent getting her ready. “Don’t worry,” Thea said. “Your makeup is waterproof.”

“You ready?” Sara asked her, helping her step into her heels as Thea draped the veil over her face, the two other them leading her to the door that she would be walking through. Felicity nodded, smiling excitedly at the prospect of finally marrying her fiancé. Thea and Sara walked through first, squeezing through the door so that no one could see Felicity, and when the music started, Felicity took a deep breath before opening the door, mouth dropping open in surprise when she saw Laurel waiting for her.

“Laurel-“

“Oliver said you needed someone to walk you down the aisle.” Felicity burst into tears, wrapping her arms around her best friend as they clung to each other, crying onto each other’s shoulders. Laurel pulled back, wiping at Felicity’s face, smiling through her tears. She had never planned on coming back to Starling, the memories of Tommy too much, but when Oliver had called her, telling her that Felicity was going to walk down the aisle by herself, Laurel hadn’t been able to come up with a good enough reason to stay away.

Laurel guided Felicity down the aisle, where everyone had already dissolved into tears.

Felicity married Oliver with all of their closest friends and family watching, and for the first time in a long time, everyone was able to think about Tommy without being sad, because they knew, that there in the Queen mansion, he was watching over all of them and smiling bigger than ever.

“How do you feel, Mrs. Queen?” Oliver asked her as they danced to their first song, swaying gently from side to side. Felicity beamed, pressing her lips against Oliver’s as their family cheered, laughter and happiness filling the ballroom.

“I feel like I’ll never get tired of hearing you say that.” She told him, running her hands through his hair, losing herself in his eyes. Their lives, for better or for worse, were together intertwined. They were both nineteen, married, going to be parents possibly before they even reached the age of twenty, and while it wasn’t anything like she had planned, she found that she wouldn’t change anything about the two of them.

“Tommy would’ve loved this.” Oliver said, tucking a stray curl behind Felicity’s ear. She smiled, eyes watering slightly as she glanced around, eyes landing on each member of their family. Sara and Thea were running around with their phones, snapping pictures of every single moment. Laurel was next to Moira, both of whom were tearfully watching Felicity and Oliver. Robert was speaking to Barry, no doubt offering him a job at Queen Consolidated, judging by the awestruck look on his face. Caitlin and Cisco were making drinks, both laughing, the sound of it lighting up the room.

“He would’ve. But I feel like he’s here. Watching us. He would be getting into so much trouble, right now. Probably dancing around half drunk at this point.” Oliver chuckled, holding Felicity closer as their song ended, their family applauding them. Felicity danced with Robert next, who reduced her to tears by telling her that she was the best thing to ever happen to their son, and that he was so excited to be a grandfather. Robert was never one to show emotion, and he had always been slightly intimidating to her, but seeing his eyes lit up with the excitement of his future grandchild, was almost too much for her to handle. Moira interrupted them, chiding Robert for making Felicity cry, and she held Felicity to her as they swayed, watching Oliver and Laurel waltz around the room; Laurel laughing as they did.

“This is amazing, Moira. Truly. I can’t thank you enough.” Moira just smiled, kissing the top of Felicity’s head, before thanking her for being the light of Oliver’s life.

 

* * *

 

 

Oliver finished his deployment, and afterwards he was honorably discharged from the military, due to the needs of Felicity and their child. He stayed in close contact with John, who would update him on the status of the rest of the guys from his team. He met up with Diggle and Roy any time that they were in Starling, which turned out to be pretty frequently, since they both lived in Starling. They all reminisced about Tommy, and their days in the service, and Felicity even became good friends with John’s wife, Lyla. Roy, to Oliver’s absolute horror, hit it off with Thea.

Oliver and Felicity ended up having a beautiful boy, named Thomas Merlin Queen. He grew up adored, the light of his parents lives. From a young age he took after his father, and an uncle he would never come to know. Laurel spoiled him beyond belief any time that she came to visit them from Central City. Coming to Starling didn’t hurt her as much as it had, but she preferred to stay in a different city, somewhere she could find who she was without Tommy. Oliver had taken a position at his father’s company, starting a division that would create the newest weapons and safety measures for the military. Felicity was the set to be the head of the IT apartment when she graduated from MIT. She complained for months that MIT gave her too much leeway, because they had told her they would take the necessary measures to make sure that she could graduate from Starling, but she secretly enjoyed being able to stay home with her son, making sure that she didn’t miss a second of him growing up.

 

* * *

 

 

“Tommy, don’t you dare put your hand in that cookie jar!” Felicity threatened, point a spoon at him from across the counter. He was in his high chair, smearing apple sauce all over his table. He giggled, clapping his hands together with a self-satisfied smile. Felicity grinned, going back to stirring the soup on the stove, her body half turned to keep an eye on her child. He was as mischievous as the man he had been named after, and Felicity feared for their safety if they ended up having another boy. She had found out earlier that day that they were going to have another baby. It hadn’t been planned for, and it hadn’t been an accident. Felicity viewed it as their fate; everything that had ever happened to them led them to the people they were today. When she heard the door open she smiled excitedly to herself, watching as Oliver stepped into their kitchen, draping his suit jacket over the back of one of the barstools before he stepped to Felicity, dragging her in for a long kiss.

“Mmm, I missed you, Mrs. Queen.” He mumbled against her lips, kissing her again before he moved to Tommy swooping him up in his arms as his son giggled, gabbing in a language no one could understand.

“I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of hearing you call me that.” She said, walking over to them and sliding her hands under his suspenders. Oliver smiled down at her, their child resting on one hip as he kissed her hair, looking between them.

“I don’t think I’ll ever be happier than I am right now.” He whispered, holding them closer as he sighed, breathing in the smell of Felicity, and the way Tommy still smelled like a baby, tiny and innocent, only concerned about food and pulling on his mom’s hair.

“I think you could be,” she said, looking up at him through her lashes, teeth tugging on her bottom lip. “I’m pregnant.”

“Wait-what? You’re-“ Felicity nodded, still chewing on her bottom lip as a smile took over her features, at the look of shocked excitement that had brightened his face. He laughed, pulling Felicity into a hug as Tommy babbled, clapping his hands as if he understood what was happening. Oliver kissed her, one hand resting on her lower back as he held her against him, relishing in the way she rested her hands on either side of his neck, clinging to him. “You’re right.” He whispered, doing his best to keep his tears in check. “I am happier.”

Tommy and his younger sister, Emmaline, grew up hearing all about their Uncle Tommy. Felicity and Oliver did their best to make sure that their children knew how special their uncle was, and that he was watching over them, even if they couldn’t see him. Tommy grew up to be a combination of his uncle and his father, and sometimes, Felicity felt like their son had replaced her brother as her husband’s best friend…and the thought warmed her heart. It hadn’t been forced, and they didn’t tell Tommy about his uncle because they wanted him to be like him, but because they wanted to keep his memory alive, and they did, in the best ways. Not a day went by that they didn’t feel Tommy missing from their lives, but as time went on, it became easier and easier to remember all of the good about Tommy, and all the things that they had done together. Tommy Merlyn lived on in the lives of his family. Tommy Merlyn lived on a hero.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i can't thank you guys enough for sticking with me. This fic has been a wild ride, and as far as first fics go I'm pretty proud of it. This is for sure not the end of my writing about Felicity and Oliver. In fact, if any of you are interested, I'm on chapter 3 of an Arrow AU ft. Sons of Anarchy and Fast and Furious elements. You can also find me on tumblr, at ollie-and-licity, where i'm just waiting for people to come to me with requests for one-shots or multi chapters. 
> 
> You guys have been amazing. I love you all so, so much and I hope that I will see you on my other fics. 
> 
> xoxo


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